For example, baseball statisticians have noticed more strikeouts among professional baseball teams due to the ball rising imperceptibly with increased humidity causing hitters to miss the ball as they take full swing, that they would ordinarily manage a single or extra bases. And football quarterbacks have been off by 4.4% in pass completion due to increased humidity brought on by fossil fuel burning carrying the football slightly off course.
Pants manufacturers having noticed zippers getting stuck more often consulting with the Center for Climate Change says is a direct result of Global Warming causing zippers to bunch up an not slide up or down as easily as it does in winter.
The increase in wedgies among men and women of all ages posed a problem for the scientific team at the Institute for Wedgie Research not being able to find a direct cause for increased wedgies as of yet but they believe it very possibly a result of the Global Warming phenomena that tend to dry out elastic inner bands that keep underwear fitting snugly and thus end up with 'garment creep' that is typical of wedgie victims.
The greatest threat that Global Warming has posed is the 'reverse season syndrome' where a condition like Global Warming with the seasonal effect of summer time type climate causing the 'reverse season syndrome' where the humid weather associated with summer bringing a "spring like rebirth" in certain Sub-Sahara, desert regions as characterized by the 'Arab Spring' in areas of North, Western Africa, in countries such as Libya, Egypt, Tunisia and as far East as Syria.
We understand, and we scoff.
But the typical 20-something knows more about “global warming” than the US Constitution.
That’s why the future of freedom is dim.
7 degrees when I got up at 6 AM this morning. That’s considerably below normal.
How in the world does a publication like Scientific American, print this crap?
Heh. See the map for our own drought forecast.
And....Burning food as fuel?
You are paying 12% more for fuel because of Ethanol. Smile big Corn Lobby
Bush 41 signed of on this one.
I hate them all.
When I was a teenager interested in science I really enjoyed the articles in Scientific American. But now they’ve drunk the liberal kool-ade and have just become Pseudoscientific Amerikan.
If the leprechauns don’t stop breeding unicorns beneath the surface of the Earth (where it’s “VERY hot”) then the only thing that can save us is giving all of our freedoms and several trillion dollars to the government!
Don’t forget to rid the planet of dangerous dihydrogen monoxide.
Do it for the children!