Posted on 03/11/2013 7:11:51 AM PDT by bigtoona
Someone recently told me she wanted her children to “think for themselves.”
Not me, I said. If I was still in my active parenting years, I would most definitely want my children to think like I do. That would be, in fact, my primary purpose. I would want them to accept that my values are the right values to hold and I’d want them to eventually make every effort to pass those values on to their children. But then, I don’t subscribe to the postmodern notion that all values are equal. I’m not a relativist.
But even in the case of a person who doesn’t think like I do and (therefore) doesn’t hold the values I hold, wouldn’t that person still want their children to think like they do? Wouldn’t a person who believes all values are equal, that right and wrong are relative concepts, want their kids to believe likewise? It’s called a worldview, and there’s really little point in investing 18 or more years of time, effort and money in raising a child if one is not trying to produce someone who will subscribe to a certain, defined worldview and (therefore) champion certain values.
How do you pass your values on to your children? From the earliest possible time in their lives, you talk about your values and you explain how they comprise your code for living. Why do you donate $100 bill you found blowing in the wind to the local homeless shelter? Why don’t you allow your children to watch certain movies and television shows? You explain to your children that your definitions of right and wrong, your decisions, and your opinions about various matters are based on certain core principles. Your ability to articulate those principles clearly enough that a 5-year-old can understand them reflects that you are clear on them yourself. And you not only talk about your values, but you walk your talk. There’s no room for “Do as I say, not as I do” in an ethical worldview.
This is the process by which you shape your child’s character, by which you produce a good citizen, someone who will make the community a better place. Everything else – grades, athletic accomplishments, artistic talents, and so on – is secondary. Raising a mathematically and musically gifted child who wins a scholarship to Harvard is fine, but when all is said and done, good parenting is simply an act of love for your neighbor.
But make no mistake, no matter how well you communicate your worldview to your children, they will think for themselves, and from a very early age. They will even make decisions that will cause you to scratch your head in wonder or weep with sorrow. Parenting is an influence; it does not determine the outcome. Even the most well-parented (by whatever standard) child is capable, on any given day, of acting in ways that are completely inconsistent with his or her upbringing. That fact, if not fully accepted, can generate lots of parental frustration, guilt, or both.
As your great-grandmother put it, “Every child has a mind of his own.”
Read more here: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2013/02/25/3876913/share-your-values-with-your-children.html#storylink=cpy
My 12 year old was listening to the news last week, and they mentioned the state clamping down on consumers who bought too much soda or fatty foods. He thought it was a good idea.
I spent the next 5 minutes telling him about incremental government encroachment and how government is a boa constrictor, not a friend. He got it.
I’ll make a conservative out of him yet.
Passing values from one generation to the next is a biblical concept,
no wonder the left opposes it.
I laugh at socialists that insist that they are allowing their children (the ones they don’t kill) to form their own views. What they really mean is, “their own views inside of the confines of socialism and political correctness”.
I’m straight forward about the fact that I expect my children to hold my views on liberty and personal responsibility.
I think its easy for liberals to impose liberal views on their kids, they just need to stand back and do nothing. Our culture has been rotted so much that liberalism is the default now. No guidance at all = your kid wearing a Che shirt in college.
4 out of my 5 are tow the line conservatives. The odd teenager out is enamored with pop culture and has a misguided soft heart. While not an Nobama fan she just lives in an fantasy world where every one is good and we should all be friends, but has no interest at all in the political process or our history. We all are still trying to open her eyes before she enters the world and becomes a victim.
“fantasy world where everyone is good” is the result of Humanist indoctrination/teaching.
“People are fallen sinners” is the reality.
With the latter as the basis of your worldview, you don’t have to make excuses as to why reality doesn’t match what you believe “should be”.
I agree. We moved them to private Chriostian school a couple years ago but this one may have had a bit more indoctrination we have to overcome.
I met my stepson when he was 5, and his mother and I have always discussed and imparted, and at times, enforced, our values upon him.
He has learned to “ask questions” in class that make some of his teachers uncomfortable; leading” questions that make his teachers defend liberal positions, and he’s found that they’re not very good at it. But, he always remains respectful and approaches it in a way that he’s sincere and innocently wanting to know whatever he is asking about.
Makes me proud. He’s only 14, but he can articulate conservative positions much better than most adult liberals can explain their own. Can’t count the number of times he’s come home and said, “You won’t BELIEVE what they told me today...”
My youngest was a conservative from age 2. Her favorite book was Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed! I was sure she would get thrown out of kindergarten for being politically incorrect. :)
My oldest two rant about the out-of-control government, and the other child came home and told me her role model was Ronald Reagan. I guess I’m doing ok.
We have open discussions about politics at our dinner table. I present my philosophies, my wife presents hers, and we tell the children to make up their own minds.
What I’ve got is a high school senior who is more conservative on certain issues than I am, and a fifth grader who is the star of the class in social studies.
By all means, talk with your kids and do it often. It’s the only way to ensure that the radical left won’t entirely co-opt the next generation too.
Knowing that leftists play off a child’s innocence and their natural rebellion against evil, I taught my sons that we are protesting evil in entertairnment, behavior and spending.
I defined evil and defined good based on our culture - the Bible or Christianisty. As they grew, we observed socialist protests for “freedom” (committing evil and imposing it on everyone) versus the protests (shunning evil by choosing to reject it) we live by based on biblical right and wrong.
Freedom in God’s kingdom means people can commit any degree of darkness or light they choose to commit, but they will pay with natural consequences of darkness and light. The natural consequences of evil are proven in all social statistics.
So if you are wondering if homosexuality, out of wedlock birth, theft, lying, hating, etc. is evil, read the statistics. The numbers (statistics of outcomes) back the Bible’s world view of right and wrong - the way one should live.
That is how you teach your children to use their brains and hearts in life.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.