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Would You Practice Polygamy If It Were Legal?
Slate ^ | Friday, July 26, 2013 | Faye Wang

Posted on 07/27/2013 12:15:47 PM PDT by nickcarraway

No.

And not because of moral reasons, it's simply a matter of practicality. I've never seen a polygamous relationship in which every participant was happy and content. Because of my research into alternative lifestyles, I actually know a lot of people who are in polygamous relationships (there are support groups for that, you know). I don't think it is immoral, as long as all parties involved are consenting adults.

However in practice, such a relationship requires way too much energy to maintain, and one or two people are always left feeling unhappy, undervalued, not needed, and not loved. Human beings are selfish and possessive, especially when they're in love. Very few people are capable of sharing their loved ones with other people, even under the pretense that you receive love from the other person. This is especially true if the polygamous relationship is 1 male + multiple females or 1 female + multiple males. One will undoubtedly become the favorite, and the other will end up resentful and feeling depressed.

An ideal situation, which most polygamous relationships I knew were trying to achieve, is somewhat a "network" of love, instead of a pyramid. For example, in a relationship with one male and three females, if the love exists only between the male and each female, it's not going to work. It has to be male and female, and female and female, in other words, everyone needs to love everyone.

(Excerpt) Read more at slate.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Extended News
KEYWORDS: randsconcerntrolls
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To: dfwgator

If I want to hear two women complaining, I will phone my ex-wives.


141 posted on 07/27/2013 8:20:25 PM PDT by donmeaker (Blunderbuss: A short weapon, ... now superceded in civilized countries by more advanced weaponry.)
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To: BenLurkin

The next assault on the family I could see would be two gay men “marrying” their surrogate or breeder. She gets to have a baby they primarily raise, there are fewer legal wranglings than getting a surrogate to give up her rights or pay her, and the men can divorce her when they no longer want her around or leave the child with her when they want to go out. And they’d argue that it is creating a family like ours, just with an extra adult.
The other oddity would be the two gay men and two gay women gathered into an extended family, with the men fathering children artificially with the women (I’ve hard of it) and gaining rights via marriage while remaining with their same-sex partners.
But the Heinlein views of polygamous families and line marriages as happy, supportive places are purely fantasy. And “open” relationships make everyone jealous if not physically ill, in a way that a committed marriage will not.


142 posted on 07/27/2013 8:21:51 PM PDT by tbw2
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To: Veggie Todd

Or if you prefer, one disappointing woman is enough for me.


143 posted on 07/27/2013 8:22:16 PM PDT by donmeaker (Blunderbuss: A short weapon, ... now superceded in civilized countries by more advanced weaponry.)
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To: Mr. Jeeves

Paint your Wagon....


144 posted on 07/27/2013 8:22:53 PM PDT by donmeaker (Blunderbuss: A short weapon, ... now superceded in civilized countries by more advanced weaponry.)
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To: Mr. Jeeves

In “Roughing It” Mark Twain has a chapter on Brigham Young and the Mormons. As a father, Brigham Young has the duty to be fair to his many offspring. A visitor gave one child a penny whistle that he had in his pocket. To be fair, Brigham Young had to get equivalent penny whistles for each of his over 100 children. They had to talk for two weeks using hand signals.

Brigham Young’s advice: 42 wives may have been a little excessive. To younger men he recommends moderation, based on his own experience. Noone needs more than 10 or 11 wives.


145 posted on 07/27/2013 8:27:30 PM PDT by donmeaker (Blunderbuss: A short weapon, ... now superceded in civilized countries by more advanced weaponry.)
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To: central_va

I guess even a dog can dream.


146 posted on 07/27/2013 8:29:28 PM PDT by donmeaker (Blunderbuss: A short weapon, ... now superceded in civilized countries by more advanced weaponry.)
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To: Mr. Jeeves; Chickensoup
Instinct would drive polyandrous men to kill each other off until only one remained.

From what I've read, polyandry often occurs in situations where a bunch of brothers share a wife (fraternal polyandry). If they can't be the dad, at least they can be a uncle. Sort of like a simultaneous levirate.

147 posted on 07/27/2013 8:36:45 PM PDT by thecodont
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To: donmeaker
Or if you prefer, one disappointing woman is enough for me.

Reminds me of the old joke. God asks Adam and Eve which one wants to be able to pee standing up. Adam steps forward and says the he definitely deserves to be able to pee standing up. So God says, "Ok Eve, I guess you're stuck with multiple orgasms".

148 posted on 07/28/2013 12:13:36 AM PDT by Veggie Todd (What difference does it make?)
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To: nickcarraway
Multiple Mothers-in-Law?

Uh-uh.

I have one and we get along well, (thankfully, but many are not so lucky).

149 posted on 07/28/2013 1:28:27 AM PDT by Smokin' Joe (How often God must weep at humans' folly. Stand fast. God knows what He is doing)
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To: allendale

Unless he has a couple of wives, a mistress and multiple one night stands...


150 posted on 07/28/2013 1:30:26 AM PDT by Smokin' Joe (How often God must weep at humans' folly. Stand fast. God knows what He is doing)
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