I really don’t want to get into a whole discussion on the merits of the Catholic Church. But I have to say that I don’t think they are the same things. On one hand you are telling someone that they can’t simply be members of the church because of something they did in their twenties (get married outside of the church but now regret it) and on the other hand the pope is saying that men who have had homosexual sex and currently identify as homosexuals can be priests and LEAD the church.
I completely agree that people who have made mistakes should be allowed to ask for forgiveness and be allowed to become part of the church.
I just think it is a huge mistake to allow men with a history of homosexual activity and currently identify as being homosexuals to be PRIESTS.
The "and currently identify as homosexuals" part is what needs careful defining. If you mean, "is currently disturbed by a strong cujrrent of homosexual appetite," the answer would be "no." That sort of person isn't fit for a pastoral role.
If you mean "currently identifies with the LGBT subculture or social movement or political advocacy groups," the answer would be "no." That person --- even if they are heterosexual!! --- is advocating things outside of Dvine and Natural Law. I would include "straight" academics or political figures who advocate for gay marriage and the like.
If you mean "currently still finds his spontaneous attractions tend toward men, but he does not cooperate with these attractions in thought, word or deed" --- well then, that's different. That's virtuous. That person can be fairly described as "conforming himself to Christ" --- and that's what the priesthood, indeed the Christian life, is all about.