1. That peanut butter might spark an allergic reaction with a fellow student in a classroom in another annex of the school.
2. Jelly? Do I need to tell Moochelle on you about your failure to obey the new rules about sweets?
3. That tree-killing paper bag just screams out about your indifference to the environment and your hatred of trees.
4. Apples feel pain.
Then bite a liberal instead. (Make sure your shots are up-to-date.)