Ms. Sills (lovely coat by the way!) may I suggest this:
Contact a Mr. Peter Lanza. Now he won't be easy to find or reach but you may be able to contact him through a Mr. Robbie Parker. You can find him listed in the Actors Guild.
Ask Mr. Lanza if his 'son' Ryan is available to come to your school and pretend to assassinate oh say 30 students or more.
Now, now I know what you're thinking. Your bros, your homies, Barry and Holder won't like this, but I assure you you are wrong. They'll love it. So you get the NY State Police to set up a fake shooting and then you make sure to get some really good amateur actors and then invite Wolf Blitzer, Katie, and Anderson Cooper (tell him to remember to bring all of his nose this time) and I believe that within just a few short months you'll be receiving a check from Gov. Cuomo for about $50,000,000 to build a new school.
$50 mil!! You'll even be able to afford a real mink!!! So good luck and good shooting. Remember though!! NO SURVIVORS!!!!!!! They're just loose ends you can't afford!
“$50,000,000 to build a new school.”
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Why not go for the gold? Where I live the taxpayers were charged $197 million for a high school.
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