That's car, not Carr, crashing into bldg
Howie Carr, Boston Herald 2/1/14
For once, I agree with Mike Dukakis.
They shouldn’t name South Station after Pee Wee.
How about attaching the 65-inch-tall former governor’s name to something more appropriate, like the Allston tollbooths?
Now they name stadiums and arenas after companies. So how does this sound — “The M. Stanley Dukakis Department of Revenue”?
The Duke is of course correct that when you have something named after you, it’s a sure sign that you’re rounding third, reaching the checkout counter, fill in whatever cliche you want.
As one of my favorite fictional private detectives, Travis McGee, once said: “Becoming a legend in your own time usually means you don’t have much time left.”
But that’s only the most obvious reason to avoid having something named after you. Consider the local statesmen around here and the structures they have named after them.
There’s the Barbara Walters’ Boyfriend Courthouse. There’s a bridge in South Boston named after a politician who Whitey Bulger used to pay $100 a week to, or so said Stevie Flemmi in his DEA-6 confession.
Isn’t there a school in Cambridge named after a distinguished solon whose son was once accused of selling cocaine out of her car, and who was more recently charged with being a pimp in Brockton? Ted Williams, the man not the tunnel, allegedly beat his wife.
It’s practically public policy in the commonwealth: If you’re indicted, you’re invited ... to have something named after you.
Howard Stern once asked New Jersey to name a rest stop after him on the Turnpike. His request was granted. Now that’s a proposal everyone could get behind: The Mr. Kitty Dukakis Rest Area.
Many times a building commemorates a historical event, and the person who figured in that memorable moment. For instance, just last week an epochal first occurred at the State House. For the first time in more than 200 years, a solon was led into the building in handcuffs, rather than out of it.
There is only one possible way to pay tribute to that unforgettable occasion: the Carlos Henriquez Holding Pen.
Another problem with the South Station idea, just technical, but worth mentioning nonetheless. The late House Speaker George Keverian used to say of the Duke: “If they ever name a street after him, it’ll have to be one way.”
Are we ready to have all the trains at South Station running one way?
I think we need, in one of the Duke’s favorite phrases, a nationwide search. For a national model, one that will be a public-private partnership ...
Surely the Pentagon has a new model tank somewhere in the pipeline.
The Dukakis F-88 — voice-activated, it does whatever Billy Bulger tells it to do. The only problem is, once you start it, it only heads one way — right over the nearest cliff.