Posted on 03/25/2014 12:04:50 PM PDT by Dallas59
Anything is possible, but because she is only 8, I can’t think of anything earthshattering-or not correctable at home-she might have done. But teasing about the kid’s weight could well have provoked some inappropriate behavior in response, and we have no idea what the child might have told her grandparents if that happened. All of us who are parents here know how cruel children can be.
Actually, the bible does require both modesty in dress and sex role appropriateness. Some might argue that applies to adults, but that would be purely a matter of how one interpreted it. In other words, that makes it this church’s business and no one else’s.
So, if they call “dress code” a policy that they understand to be according to their interpretation of biblical standards, then my response is that it’s America and their biblical interpretation is no one’s business so long as they aren’t abusing that freedom to commit heinous crimes like murder.
And that is probably all they have been advised to say by their attorney, like any school.
I went to Catholic school, and so did my kids-the uniforms were generic-a white blouse and pleated checkered skirt that was just above the knee when I was a kid, a white blouse and either a medium blue jumper or a medium blue skirt-also above the knee for my girls. I’ve never seen an Amish or Mennonite outfit at a private school around here, either...
That could be too. Some matches just don’t work.
I had the image of a public school forcing a tomboy to use the boy facilities and list her as a boy over her objections. lol
I think the whole thing is overblown. We’ve had very mixed quality encounters with private schools. Some combinations just do NOT work. Usually both schools and parents can grasp that, or why not go some one size fits all route like the government schools.
I’m a bit jaundiced towards the school in this case. Partly because Peppermint Patty tomboy types have always been my favorites, but mostly because of the gratuitous snark about homosexuality. On an EIGHT year old? Please. Unless the grandparents were pushing such ideology via their ward, that has NO application, and ought be retracted.
Can’t tell from the article. As someone said, there is more to this story.
I have always liked tomboys too, but there was no snark about homosexuality, they were repeating a line from their school policy, they made no extraneous comment, probably under legal advice.
When my daughters were little, they both had long, beautiful hair. Then they got head lice at school and I whacked it all off. Cried while doing it, but it had to be done. I love to see little girls with long hair.
Strange the grandparents are involved and not the parents.
If they have a dress code and it’s not being followed, then that should be referenced in the letter. Absolutely no need to bring up the matter of gender confusion in an eight year old. It’s unnecessary and isn’t germane to the dress code. Nor is it any of their business unless they are licensed professionals qualified to diagnose children.
The dress code makes no reference to hair length for girls and the girl is not sporting an extreme hair cut or color, so should not be referenced in the letter because it’s not an actionable issue under their code.
Sound like there might be somebody who feels like the girl may be dressing to the letter of law, but not in the spirit of the law in being tom boyish, chubby and possibly slovenly (playing in the mud) all of which is NORMAL for 8 year olds of either gender.
Can’t help but wonder if we have adults stupidly sexualizing the non sexual in children. Or some well meaning git wanted to make a project of the child, prettify her, teach her to be interested in feminine ways and the eight year old resisted because she’s, you know, only eight and doesn’t care about that stuff right now.
Wouldn’t be the first “Aunt Polly” types who complicated things with their well meant but unwanted concerns about unimportant trivia in a church setting.
Exactly, the story says "An administrator from Timberlake Christian, said the problem with Sunnie goes "far beyond her hair length" ". And they didn't kick her out, they just told her to abide by the policies. Reminds me of my son, the summer after High School, when I told him he couldn't have purple hair and some other similar stuff. He chose to move out to a friend's. They assumed he was kicked out, and made a big fuss over him. One day I went to pick him up and drive him to work, and they were so surprised to meet me and see I didn't have horns. I think they were a little puzzled after that.
What I always seem to miss is what makes it our business.
Gender confusion is a term. It is not a licensed term. This group uses it within the parameters of their own religious understandings. They know what they mean by it, and to be honest, since I've a lot of experience with other religions, I know what they mean by it. Unless licensed professionals are ordained within their religious community, then they really don't get to have an opinion in that Christian school.
The dress code makes no reference to hair length for girls and the girl is not sporting an extreme hair cut or color
Here's their dress code and appearance code. "Extreme" is not defined, therefore, it is their definition. dress code
slovenly....NORMAL...
I assume they are the administrators of that school and that their interpretations are based on their understandings of their own code and their own religious beliefs. We have a lot of Amish in our area wearing long dresses and bonnets ALWAYS. Even in their schools. If a little Amish girl went in with a butch cut and raggedy blue jeans would THEY be within their rights to direct otherwise?
sexualizing...prettify
And that paragraph makes me wonder why some don't just let religious people be themselves. That is what tolerance means. You live with differences.
LOL
Yes, things are frequently not as we choose to see them.
No. You should have stopped at the period.
Now, the school may do whatever it wants in this case and I wouldn't have it any other way, but's still wrong.
This is a sad story but I think I understand where the administrators are coming from.
I’m guessing that the school has a dress code and little Sunni wanted to dress like the boys, in addition to her gender confusion, which the school already knew about from the grandparents.
The administrators, quite correctly in my view, took the cautious approach. Remember, they didn’t kick her out, the grandparents withdrew the child because of a very loving letter from school administrators.
The media will make this out as Christian bigotry but the grandparents are a problem here. If they were believing Christians they wouldn’t go on the evening news.
Careful, there is far more to this story than the media let on. As the previous commentator said, which is more likely -- that Christians were acting hatefully or that media (and the grandparents) was blowing this out of proportion? We both know that the latter is more likely.
Note that the grandma didn't read the entire letter. I froze the screen and read the actual letter from the school to the grandparents, as much as I could see on camera.
The letter is a loving and personal letter to the grandparents. The grandparents have the child in counseling about her gender identity and the school knows about that as well. In the letter, the administrators do not throw the girl out of school but merely ask the grandparents to consider carefully whether the girl belongs there. It was a touching and sensitively written letter.
It's the grandparents that have an agenda. They presumably signed a statement of faith but are, I'm guessing, casual or Sunday Christians, because a sincere Christian would not go to the media.
There is no doubt a long back story here. The school year is 2/3 over and I'm guessing that the girl didn't like to wear the girl version of the dress code. I'm also guessing that she was talking to the other students about her gender identity issues on the playground and between classes, because the letter specifically addresses such. So, after seven months of this child's behavior, generating comments from students and faculty, the administration finally sent a letter home. Not a bigoted letter demanding that the grandparents do something but a loving letter asking the grandparents to consider something.
I learned long ago not to jump to conclusions about media reports.
Dude, read the posts and consider those that speculate on the back story. Then also consider one of two options: (1) The private school is filled with hateful Christian bigots who acted according to their presumed hateful beliefs; or (2) the grandparents, aided by the media, have an agenda and are overdramatizing this matter. It’s pretty clear to me that the latter is the correct story.
Again, scan the previous posts before sending me an angry reply.
In a later post, I offered the admittedly cynical opinion that some lawyers were going to make money. But adults making money by using a little kid is still wrong. As a tomboy and mom of girls, I think this gender identity crap is nonsense from the gitgo-your gender is what God-and your
dna says you are.
I may work in a mostly-male occupation and hang out with guys, but I was always aware of my female gender, what my reproductive and sexual role was, and that a male was the proper future partner for me. My parents were responsible for that-if I’d started throwing tantrums about being a boy, I’d have gotten an ass beating, not a trip to a therapist-and that is entirely proper.
You can have some traits of the opposite gender and be comfortable in your own-all that parents/grandparents who cater to childish whims are doing is screwing kids up-and that really is child abuse, in my opinion...
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