I agree with everything you wrote. We all know politics is war by other means. It just seemed to me that the idea of same-sex-sandwich was kind of, well, a little lame. If, as you say, we need to attempt to control the language then don’t we need something a little more powerful - something with an emotional kick to it? That’s all I’m suggesting.
The only language option I think we have is to stop calling Holy Matrimony “marriage.” Let them have the word, and call what God has commanded by some term that the same-sexers would never want to use. “Holy Matrimony” is probably the most accurate, though it isn’t, well, catchy.