A Man in California Is Fighting a Caffeine DUI, and the State Won't Back Down

Yahoo News ^ | 12/29/2016

[Lazamataz]

A California man is in the midst of a lengthy legal battle following a driving under the influence charge that was issued almost 18 months ago for operating a car while under the influence of caffeine, reports said. I'm sorry, did we miss something? When did it become illegal to drive after consuming some espresso?

Joseph Schwab, 36, was pulled over on August 5, 2015, by a California Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control agent in an unmarked car who claimed the 36-year-old had cut her off and was driving erratically, The Guardian reported. The agent administered a breathalyzer test which displayed a 0.00% blood alcohol level, according to Schwab's lawyer. After that test, Schwab was put into county jail and had his blood taken for an addition toxicology test. The following report concluded that he had no illegal drugs in his system.

It wasn't until samples were sent to an outside testing facility in Pennsylvania that caffeine showed up as the only drug in Schwab's system when he was arrested, The Guardian reported. Now, just about 18 months later, Schwab and his attorney are gearing up for trial.

[Lazamataz]

With all due respect, it is not that California might be insane. It is that they aren't even in the same ZIPCODE as sane. They don't even know sane EXISTS. They saw a movie about sanity and rushed out of the theater. They will not get on an elevator if there are more than one sane persons on it. They are a buoy of insanity in the Great Insane Sea. Sanity has never even violated their airspace. They, alone, accounts for 71% of America's GDP of insanity. Veni, Vidi, Krazy: They came, they saw, they got insane. They tend to thier insanity like a stadium tends to its playing-field grass. They often asks thier husband if thier insanity makes thier butt look big. They spoons with thier insanity at night, and whispers sweet loving coos into its ear. They once ordered a Baskin-Robbins ice cream cone in the flavor 'Chocolate Insanity', and told the attendent to hold the Chocolate. The Aztec God of Insanity is named Californiqiazotal. They once heard Saddam's last name, and remarked, "Who's sane? Certainly not me!"

[vooch]

CALexit

every conservative should strongly support

[Lazamataz]

Seriously. It’s time for them to go.

[Eccl 10:2]

Obama should pardon him.

[RegulatorCountry]

Sounds to me as if Ms. Government Agent is determined to have the last word in a road rage incident. I guess she's sure showing him.

Exactly the sort of petty tyrant who shouldn't be allowed within a hundred yards of authority over other people.

[pax_et_bonum]

That’s crazy.

;-)

[eyeamok]

It is reasons just like this that we have US Attorneys, I sure hope President Trump sends one to ARREST AND PROSECUTE EVERY LAST PERSON INVOLVED, INCLUDING THE JUDGE.

FELONY KIDNAPPING, EXTORTION

[Lazamataz]

This is PRECISELY why Donald J. Trump won.

[Fai Mao]

They should go but via immigration. Let them move to some shi*bag country with a diverse culture and where the natives hate whites and they can validate their guilt as the oppressors of the world.

[ThomasThomas]

When Kramer got caffeined up on the show he was unfit to drive

[Vigilanteman]

I have encountered people who are hyper from overconsumption of caffeine. But they are not even in the same league as those under the influence of alcohol.

Pure idiocy when there is no law against driving under the influence of caffeine. Cite the guy for erratic driving if it applies, but you can't make up a new ex-post facto law just because you don't like people driving under the influence of caffeine!

[Vigilanteman]

I nominate Somalia to fill that role. It has the climate of California and the population density of Kansas. It is astride one of the world's busiest trade routes with over 2000 miles of coastline.

Give China a mandate to govern it and resettle refugees from all over the Muslim world and/or those uncomfortable with the cultures of traditional refugee accepting countries. Let them build a model of world diversity.

Hell, even move the UN Headquarters to Mogadishu to supervise this glorious project more easily!

[Karl Spooner]

Just in. Justice prevailed.

DA drops DUI charge after Fairfield man tests positive for caffeine

[spodefly]

Next up for the “Great” state of California: DUI for Turkey Related Tryptophan Intoxication.

[Shadowstrike]

I keep saying, one day, maybe years in the future they are going to discover that some unknown, unseen gas has been seeping out of all those fault lines...

[Vendome]

1. If I hadn’t been drinking or doing drugs, I would never submit to a drug test, “After” passing a FST.

This falls under the phrase “If you don’t have anything to hide...”. The result was a fishing expedition, looking for a charge, not a probable cause investigation.

2. This so called officer needs to be investigated as does everyone involved in the entire process for unlawful detainment, under the color of law, false charges(there is no law on the books for caffeine, etc,, etc, etc.

I usually let most sleights go but, this one would have me at an attorney’s office looking for my share of the public pie for the abuse...

[Chode]

malicious prosecution

[soycd]

Justice will be served when the perp is toes up or flat broke.

[JoeProBono]

[RooRoobird20]

I have several extended family members who are Californians. The depth width and height of their insanity cannot be measured. But they don’t understand they’re insane because everyone they know is just like them. Now that Trump is POTUS, their insanity is spiraling completely out of control. I’m glad they are suffering.