[COBOL2Java]

I love this comment:

Investigators are trying to figure out where the ATMs came from. It is unclear if they have money in them.

[csvset]

Saw some footage the other day where guys used a stolen forklift to load a ATM in to a stolen U-haul. That theft was in Texas .

[Arm_Bears]

DC public school grads who no doubt thought they had achieved limitless wealth.

[knarf]

Cops have first dibs on jewelry store heists, (f'rinstance).

What's missing, Mr Owner?

I'll have to check my inventory ... it could take a day or so.

[super7man]

Its a lot of work to steal an ATM. They’re heavy and well bolted in.

Better off getting a job.

Or even selling stolen fork lifts.

[King Moonracer]

Don’t atms have the dye packet that tellers used to have? Do tellers still have the dye packet? I did 30 years ago.

[G Larry]

The ultimate irony:

WDC IS an ATM!!!

Why would anybody need to steal one? (or two?)

[momincombatboots]

Somehow I misunderstood the headline. I thought they were talking code for taxpayers wallet packed with stimulus money.

[Az Joe]

I thought these things had GPS devices in them.

[Califreak]