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DECEMBER 24, 2024
(AP)
North Pole—A great tragedy for children across the globe happened early this morning as Santa Claus died in his sleep of AIDS. He was 700 years old.
Santa’s husband, Mr. Claus gave a brief statement saying “Christmas is cancelled. It’ll never be the same again”.
The workshop elves gathered to mourn amid a warehouse stacked to the ceiling with gift wrapped boxes of newly made toys to stunned to consider their now bleak future...