[Boogieman]

"Worse, I’ve gotten facial changes that make me look like Kim Scott, Cook Co. IL State’s Attorney (for an idea just check out “Planet of the Apes”). WHAT AM I TO DO??????"

Dr. Rodney has the prescription:

[Signalman]

I was a the beach with this really ugly girl.
(How ugly was she?)
One of the lifeguards asked me what I used for bait.

Dangerfield

[libstripper]

I’m shocked and horrified. None of you has any suggested treatments, or even sympathy, for my horrible predicament.