I'd be quite happy to keep my AR-15 (or equivalent .223 semi-auto long gun).
Light enough, accurate, and I know it like the back of my hand.
And if the feces ever struck the oscillatory air mover, there'd be plenty of ammo available at the cadavre sporting goods store.
AR-15. A good choice. Especially if you live in the country. (I live in a city.)
Sig P229..... classic....9mm ... penetrates yet packs a wallop...ammo worldwide.... versatile loads.... shoots like a dream... never fails....