Mother of 'Dr. Laura' found slain in Beverly Hills

Associated Press ^ | 12-20-02 | JOHN ANTCZAK

[Oldeconomybuyer]

LOS ANGELES (AP) -- The estranged mother of broadcaster "Dr. Laura" was found murdered, Laura Schlessinger announced to her radio audience Friday.

The body of Yolanda Schlessinger, 77, was found this week in her Beverly Hills condo. Police released few details other than that the killing occurred weeks ago.

[LadyDoc]

This is alas not uncommon with elderly people. Those with the tendency toward paranoia get more and more paranoid as they get older and shut out neighbors and relatives. Then they die alone.

Twenty years ago, the family would have been able to have her declared incompetent and mentally ill, and placed her in a home. But nowadays the mentally ill and senile have "rights" and even when the courts are sypmathetic, it takes months, and may not be successful. This lady sounds as if her mental illness goes back many years, but was never severe enough for family to be able to legally intervene. They are the hardest cases. I've treated a few, but mostly men. Sad.

Dr. Laura will be blamed. But you know, normal people have connections with neighbors and friends and extended families who keep an eye on them. Yet even so, one fear with the elderly is that they will die and not be found for days, even when they DO have close famlies. The blame cannot be placed on one daughter. But it won't keep the liberals from criticizing her.

[TopQuark]

Thank you for your informative message, Doc.

I have to disagree with you, however, because the issue you raise is meta-medical; that is, it goes beyond medicine. So be careful, if I may say so, not yield to temptation and make judgments that bases on your knowledge of medicine.

To what extent can one interfere with one's will when that free will wants harm to itself? See, even the question is ill-constructed as I stated it: what is harm? One should then say instead, "free will that wants to do something that others perceive as harm to itself." Their cause becomes even weaker: the perceptions of others may be wrong and, moreover, "harm" is indeed subjective.

This is a difficult question, which is resolved against the person only in clear-cut, hence sereve, cases for a reason. And the reason has nothing indeed to do with science, medical or any other.

[blau993]

I agree with you completely. The legal and medical communities fail these people very badly.

My father was an alchoholic who was never convinced that there was anything wrong with him. The more his family tried to help him, the more he resented it and withdrew. I was his oldest son, and I was the only one he would talk to in the end, but there was little even I could do to break through the wall he had erected. The day his landlord called me to say they had just found his body in his apartment is a day I knew would come eventually. I am not a particular fan of Dr. Laura, but I know the combination of frustration and grief she must feel.

[ventana]

Dr. Laura is someone whom I have respected for a long time. When her background arose I accepted her explanations: "I am not that person anymore." I was always uncomfortable with her estrangement from her mother, however.

This situation is going to do for Dr. Laura what the Thurmond birthday celebration did for Lott: it's a career killer.

With her money, even if her mother pushed her away, she could have paid a service money, a few bucks a month, to keep tabs on this old lady for the very purpose of preventing this kind of tragedy. It was her mother, and no matter how egregious, that Lord Dr. Laura likes to quote says: Honor the Mother and Father. I fear she fell down on the job. V's Wife.

[PJ-Comix]

Click on the cartoon panel to see the touching story of Dr. Laura and her mother:

[ventana]

Well, I think what I think, though I have not been in your shoes. Who knows. Sad, no matter what. V's wife.

[TopQuark]

It is clear that you have not (thank G-d) dealt with strong-willed and problematic relatives. With some, there is no recourse forever. You suggest:

With her money, even if her mother pushed her away, she could have paid a service money, a few bucks a month, to keep tabs on this old lady for the very purpose of preventing this kind of tragedy.

Ask LadyDoc if you do not believe me: if you did that with some of such problematic relatives, you would aggravate the situation. If a person has a touch of paranoia and you send someone keep tabs on them --- just stop and think for a moment what it will do. If you did that against a healthy person's will, it would be annoying. A pranoiac will only conclude what she expected: someone out there, probably her own daughter, is out to kill her.

You are lucky that you do know these things, and may you be so lucky not to know them ever. Just do not be so hasty to judge Dr. Laura. To think that she was trying to save a few buck is outright silly. (Another hint at the situation is that her mother was estranged from the whole family, not just Dr. Laura herself).

it's a career killer. That well may be: in today's culture, nothing entertains people more then misfortune of those who made it.

[Sally II]

I was surprised to hear about this on the radio. I had the same though, that Dr. Laura's relationship with her mother will be publically scrutinized and dragged through the mud after this. I feel for Dr. Laura. Just because her mother was estranged doesn't mean the greiving will be easier. In fact I imagine it could be even more painful. But she's a strong person, and this tragedy could make her even stronger and better.

After I heard about it, I thought of that one Frasier episode where they had a character thinly veiled to represent Dr. Laura, and the episode ends with Frasier getting her off the air by bringing her estranged mother to the studio. I never thought it was fair for that show to belittle Dr. Laura in that way --typical liberal stuff though... I also remember when The Cosby Show made fun of William F. Buckley, by having the lawyer mother talk down the host of a Firingline-type show. I always thought those episodes of Frasier and Cosby were of bad taste and nothing more than a Liberal's wet dream. They're always looking for ways to find the moral high ground with conservatives, even if they have to invent the senarios to feel superior.

[PJ-Comix]

See my Post #6 on this thread.

[ventana]

I think a lot of what you say has merit; do you think a multi millionairess could afford a private detective who could unobtrusively keep an eye on things? I am not talking about sending someone around "in your face" to someone who wants no contact. But money buys a lot of services. I think Laura could have sprung for this. JMO. V's wife.

[Lizavetta]

It was her mother, and no matter how egregious, that Lord Dr. Laura likes to quote says: Honor the Mother and Father. I fear she fell down on the job.

Dr. Laura also says that there are certain acts that parents commit (abuse, molestation or allowing molestation, etc.) at which time their 'parent cards' should be cut up. We simply don't know the details of their lives together or what really went on.

[ventana]

No we simply don't. And I am sure we all agree it is very sad, whatever the cirsumstances. V's wife.

[TopQuark]

do you think a multi millionairess could afford a private detective

This is precisely what I was trying to tell you: even the risk of that detective being noticed is not worth it; it may precipitate a severe reaction in a paranoid person. Judge not what you do not know. You are thinking as, and about, a healthy person. Laura's mother is not. Your very reasoning does not apply.

You need not take my answers and seek answers from those you trust more. I know enough to put doubt in you. And remember another commandment besides the one you quoted, the one about false witness. You definitely do not have sufficient grounds to be a witness in this particular case.

[koax]

that is funny!

as tom lysol said when the photos were released, "the carpet doesn't match the drapes!"

[Chemnitz]

I know a set of parents who scream insults at their daughter whenever they phone. Then they act as if nothing happened. Then they start over again later. There are many nutcase parents around. Why is this the fault of Laura S?

I think people should be quick to listen, slow to speak. That's in the Bible or Shakespeare.

After all, this was a murder. That no one knew she was dead is testimony to the woman's isolation. We should live our lives so that even the undertaker is sad that we died.

[Sabatier]

You can't force care on an elderly parent who rejects it. I'm not even sure of the legality of hiring someone to "watch" the elderly parent without her permission. It's sad when a person dies alone without any friends or family but the reason might not have been under anyone else's control but her own. It's very difficult to order appropriate care for an elderly person unless you are the person's legal guardian, even if you are that person's child.

[mombonn]

I've seen biographies about Dr. Laura which indicated that there was a very dysfunctional relationship between the parents. At some point, Dr. Laura had to choose.

I commend her for rising above her circumstances, and becoming for her son the Mother she never had.

I have heard her try in every way to encourage a relationship no matter how difficult the circumstances; but in some cases, there is no hope. I believe her relationship with her Mother was beyond hope. I also believe Dr. Laura exhausted every avenue before giving up.

My condolences to her. No matter how difficult the relationship, this is the end. I'm sure she's hurting tonight.

[FITZ]

I am not talking about sending someone around "in your face" to someone who wants no contact.

I'm not sure anyone should feel they have a right to hire someone to check up on someone who doesn't want that. The mother was living alone and most likely perfectly capable of taking care of herself ----but who knows why she was murdered.

[mombonn]

My 85-year old Dad has lived with us for the past 2 years. He has NEVER liked me, not since I was little.

Honor thy Father is what I live by. God has granted me the grace to have him in our home for these past 2 years.

As recently as this past week, he tried to blame me for something I didn't do; and accused my husband of defending me. When proved wrong, he didn't apologize.

Dr. Laura has MUCH she has endured which she hasn't made public.