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To: BBT
I don't know about everyone else, but I have had a very positive experience with this.

Recently my husband and I decided to take our children out of daycare because of the cost and because we were extremely dissatisfied with the care they were receiving. But, only one of us would be able to work. The question was, who?

It was ultimately decided that he would stay home and I would keep my job. I make far more money than he did, and my income would be enough to support us, even though we do have less money for "fun" things. But that doesn't matter, because our children are so much happier staying at home with Dad. And we can be sure that they are being well taken care of and aren't being taught anything that we would disagree with.

He had a hard time with it at first. My friends and other people we knew viewed this move as him deciding to be a "bum", but it was totally not like that. I asked the naysayers if it was the other way around, would they be calling me a bum? Of course not. It is just a double standard. He even felt like he was being a bum at first. The kids are really the ones that benefit the most. He benefits from it too, because he gets to spend a lot of valuable time with his children. And I benefit from it, because I don't have to clean the house anymore! LOL
8 posted on 12/26/2002 8:04:55 PM PST by Morrigan
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To: Morrigan
our children are so much happier staying at home with Dad. And we can be sure that they are being well taken care of and aren't being taught anything that we would disagree with. He had a hard time with it at first. My friends and other people we knew viewed this move as him deciding to be a "bum", but it was totally not like that. I asked the naysayers if it was the other way around, would they be calling me a bum? Of course not. It is just a double standard.

Exactly. That double standard can be brought down, just as you did with your local circle.

10 posted on 12/26/2002 8:08:08 PM PST by Z in Oregon
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To: Morrigan
You don't get to mother your children either. Many many women I know that worked and were unable to spend much time with their children regret it very much. You don't notice how much you've missed until the children are graduating from high school. You will hear them reminisce about childhood experiences as they ready for college or to leave home, and you will not be part of them. That HURTS.
11 posted on 12/26/2002 8:10:01 PM PST by hedgetrimmer
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To: Morrigan
Serious question, seeking to learn: Do men as child care providers develop the same sixth sense that I did? You know...the "eyes in the back of your head" sense.

My son in-law is going to be starting this job with a 3 yr. old and a new baby soon. I'm trying to convince myself he can go from rebuilding car engines to handling bathing a 6 week old infant while the 3 yr. old decides to cook popcorn or paint the cat, etc.
15 posted on 12/26/2002 8:14:51 PM PST by BBT
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To: Morrigan
My cousin is in this situation. He was laid off from his job a year ago, and his wife has a good professional job. So he's staying home with the two kids, getting them off to school, and then he takes part-time jobs until it's time to get the kids from school. It's working out well.
23 posted on 12/26/2002 8:41:45 PM PST by Ciexyz
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To: Morrigan
You go, girl! Forget about the naysayers who will pop up here, and tell you that dads just can't cut it (each parent will have their own strengths and weaknesses in various aspects of child-raising, and will need the other to step in), and the ones who say that you've run afoul of the Bible. The idea that men go out in the world to be a part of it, while women stay home, shut behind the blinds, is the truly twisted notion.

Hopefully, you will be part of a change in people's attitudes, and competent men will be able to get their kids custody away from incompetent women in divorce proceedings, where this is necessary.

Best to your guy, too, I sure don't consider him a "bum"!

25 posted on 12/26/2002 8:48:11 PM PST by hunter112
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To: Morrigan; BBT; copycat
See my post #30.
31 posted on 12/26/2002 9:09:00 PM PST by farmfriend
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