High-Priced Emancipation [Book Review: Why There Are No Good Men Left]

The Wall Street Journal ^ | Friday, January 3, 2002 | MEGHAN COX GURDON

[TroutStalker]

Anyone who has ever struggled to find a house to buy should intuitively understand the difficulties faced by the legions of accomplished, educated, 30ish women currently roaming society in search of a husband. They are the stuff of mass entertainment now, these handsome, quick-witted graduates of higher education. On TV, they're the saucy females of "Sex and the City" and "Will & Grace." They surface in fiction as lovelorn Bridget Jones and the hapless heroines of Pam Houston's best-selling short stories.

[TroutStalker]

To all those quick-witted graduates of higher education, here is something we guys have always known: Why buy the cow, when the milk is free?

[okie01]

Or, as a gentleman of my acquaintance is fond of saying, "Everytime I feel like getting married, I just find myself a woman I don't like and buy her a house."

[KC_Conspirator]

I am going to add to the discussion here TS. I would also add that liberals try so hard to cultuvate the notion that women don't need men and by the time they are 30-something they find it very hard to find any men. But as I have always said, guys should be cautious of women in their late 30 who have not married because there is usually a reason why this is so; such as they are unstable psychos, too selfish, a wacko ultra-lib, etc..

[Enterprise]

And if these college educated super-career women get a little lonely, they can always curl up with a warm fuzzy Econ 101 book.

[lady lawyer]

You beat me to it, Trout. We don't need college professors to tell us what my mother told me forty years ago. Some other goods ones are:

If he'll cheat WITH you, he'll cheat ON you.

No man will respect you if you don't respect yourself.

Never have anything to do with a man who would lay a hand on you in anger.

A man will say anything to get what he wants, but he won't respect you in the morning.

A man wants to marry someone he isn't ashamed to introduce to his mother.

. . . . Worked for me, and for my four daughters.

[TroutStalker]

Or they have been too long on the cycle:

And traditional courtship -- stages of increasing, public, romantic seriousness, culminating in marriage -- has been substantially replaced by a cyclical "relationships" system.

[2banana]

"Why There Are No Good Men Left" for women 35-45.

It is because men 25-35 are chasing women 25-35

It is because men 35-45 are chasing women 25-35

It is because women chased their careers when they were 25-35

[TroutStalker]

Your mother has more common sense than most professors. I'm sure your daughters will pass it on, too.

[TroutStalker]

You forgot the affluent men 45-65 who are looking for trophy wives 25-35.

[Hemingway's Ghost]

Mrs. Gurdon is a writer in Washington.

And a very good one. Well done, Missus.

[Enterprise]

And it's because lesbians 35-45 are also chasing women 25-35.

[alpowolf]

I'm wondering how they define "good". I'm curious for selfish reasons, of course, being a 40+ bachelor who has always wanted to be married but never seemed to be deemed "good".

[goodnesswins]

AND, maybe it's because men have seen what happens when "she" decides she doesn't "love" him anymore....and decides to find someone else (or finds someone else and decides she doesn't "love" him anymore)....she takes 1/2 the assets, the kids, and then makes him pay while she shacks up with another male.

[alpowolf]

I won't deny that I'm still looking in the women 25-35 group. I would like to start my own family, not raise somebody else's.

[Loyalist]

I'm wondering how they define "good".

It is an ever-changing definition hidden within woman's labyrinthine reasoning process.

[expatpat]

You're all right. Those gals 25-35 have got it made, it seems.

[crystalk]

What I see on dating services that I think is tragic, is the army of women about 39 to 46 who are looking for a man, supposedly, and say that they "definitely want children"-- and that they don't have any yet.

Are they just hoping the MAN has some, or have they forgotten that they have already run out the clock, so to speak.

[fuente]

Let me see, where to start.

1) Most great husbands don't make it past 30-ish before being married the first time. Why? 'Tis simple, ladies who are looking for such, find them, and remove them from the market.

2) Many older men (30-40) look for the younger types (22-30). If these older men are now looking for a family, you can probably add many of them to the count from #1 above.

3) Many of the spinsters-to-be go to the wrong places because they're accustomed to meeting the wrong type of guys. Hint: stay away from non-family oriented places and gatherings!

4) Unrealistic expectations. He probably won't be Ben Affleck, 6'3", 32" waist, 225#, with the softness and courage of Frodo, and six figure salary with the grace and style of Sean Connery. My beautiful wife has several freinds that won't look at a guy unless he resembles a >2C flawless diamond. (all insinuations included!)

[alpowolf]

It is an ever-changing definition hidden within woman's labyrinthine reasoning process

Yes, and unfortunately I'm too slow-witted to keep up. I'm always a step behind.