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To: gnarledmaw
Missing knickers mystery solved

WOMEN in two villages in Gokwe, Midlands Province, are resting easy this weekend after the mystery of vanishing knickers was finally solved.

Local man Lumeck Ncube, 62, shocked neighbours after admitting that his “rogue” goblin was behind the mysterious disappearance of 26 panties overnight on July 11.

The women went to sleep in their underwear but woke up in the nude. The mystery only deepened when all 26 panties were discovered in a heap, dumped in the woods.

The goblin was captured, and then set on fire, in front of several hundred villagers during a witch-hunt organised by Chief Njelele on Wednesday.

An inyanga was brought in from Hwange and a self-styled prophet from an apostolic sect joined the cleansing ceremony.

The two men quickly identified Ncube as the source of the villagers’ troubles, forcing him to admit that he kept a goblin at his home.

The two witch hunters, Ncube, Chief Njelele and six aides then left the cleansing ceremony and proceeded to Ncube’s home where a goblin was retrieved from one of the bedrooms.

Correspondents described a "very short, decorated, human-like creature wearing blue female panties". Silvia Marumbe, the wife of the village headman, identified the underwear as hers.

Marume told the gathered crowd that her panties vanished in 2004 – suggesting the goblin had been at it for nearly a decade.

The creature was later burnt before the huge crowd as police were forced to step in to protect Ncube from being physically attacked.

Ncube said he bought the goblin in Chakari, near Kadoma, in 1983 while working in Kwekwe.

"When I bought this goblin, my purpose was to improve my luck in life,” he told the crowd. “I wanted to get promoted at my work as well as acquiring wealth but the goblin did not perform to my expectations.”

The goblin had turned “rogue”, showing a growing appetite for sex and women’s lingerie.

“We were no longer on good terms (with the goblin),” he added.

Chief Njelele, who sought police permission to conduct the witch hunt warned: "People in my area need to behave and desist from engaging in witchcraft. Because of this strange missing panties saga, my area is now known the world over for the wrong reasons, which is a shame.

78 posted on 10/15/2015 12:24:05 PM PDT by gnarledmaw (Hive minded liberals worship leaders, sovereign conservatives elect servants.)
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To: gnarledmaw
Local man Lumeck Ncube, 62, shocked neighbours after admitting that his “rogue” goblin was behind the mysterious disappearance of 26 panties overnight on July 11. The women went to sleep in their underwear but woke up in the nude. The mystery only deepened when all 26 panties were discovered in a heap, dumped in the woods. The goblin was captured, and then set on fire, in front of several hundred villagers during a witch-hunt organised by Chief Njelele on Wednesday. An inyanga was brought in from Hwange and a self-styled prophet from an apostolic sect joined the cleansing ceremony. The two men quickly identified Ncube as the source of the villagers’ troubles, forcing him to admit that he kept a goblin at his home. The two witch hunters, Ncube, Chief Njelele and six aides then left the cleansing ceremony and proceeded to Ncube’s home where a goblin was retrieved from one of the bedrooms. Correspondents described a "very short, decorated, human-like creature wearing blue female panties". Silvia Marumbe, the wife of the village headman, identified the underwear as hers.

I am that goblin.

79 posted on 10/15/2015 12:26:48 PM PDT by Lazamataz (Ok. We won't call them 'Anchor Babies'. From now on, we shall call them 'Fetal Grappling Hooks'.)
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To: gnarledmaw
“We were no longer on good terms (with the goblin),” he added.

Herein lies the true shame. Are we not called to forgive rogue goblins, 70 X 7 times!? Oh, the humanity!!!

80 posted on 10/15/2015 12:43:31 PM PDT by FourtySeven (47)
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To: gnarledmaw
Witchcraft: Boys allegedly transforming into cats caught by Police in Rivers state

Detectives at the Rumuolumeni Divisional Police Station in Port Harcourt, Rivers State are investigating a case involving three persons who allegedly transformed to cats.

One of the suspects is a twelve-year-old boy simply identified as John who had transformed to a cat and was caught by policemen at the Rumuolumeni Division.

DailyPost reporter who visited the scene of the incident reports that the policemen became curious after noticing that a particular cat was always running across the police station and decided to lay ambush for the animal.

It was further gathered that after the animal was caught and the policemen attempted to kill it, it mysteriously transformed to a boy.

The twelve year old boy later confessed that he was initiated by one aged man named Womadi, adding that there are many of his kind in Port Harcourt, and their mission was to suck human blood and inflict their victims with diseases.

The paramount ruler of Rumuolumeni in Oibio-Akpor Local Government Area of Rivers State, Eze Ndubueze Wobo confirmed the transformation of three members of his community into cats.

Eze Wobo told Dailypost that one of the men, who is popularly called PAPA, confessed to him at the police station that he initiated the people to suck human blood and inflict their victims with diseases.

Wobo said the victim listed some items which would be used to cleanse initiated children, some which include native alligator pepper, Local gin, Local kola nut and so on.

Some of the residents of the community, including the security operatives who captured the cat before it changed into a human being said that the man confessed that he used packaged beef roll and other things to initiate the victims, who are mainly schoolchildren.

81 posted on 10/15/2015 1:09:41 PM PDT by gnarledmaw (Hive minded liberals worship leaders, sovereign conservatives elect servants.)
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