Posted on 02/24/2003 8:41:02 PM PST by PJ-Comix
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I actually got one of those Nigerian scam artists interested in buying the Brooklyn Bridge from me. First let us take a trip down memory lane with his original e-mail to me which I posted on this THREAD and which I reprint below:
Attn: Sir,
I am Mr. Martin Uche Senior Manager accounts/audit department, in (UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC) Mr. Mark johnson a national of your country, who was a consultant with Shell-development Company in Nigeria and a personal friend Died and left behind his deposit in my finance house(UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC) valued at $7,753,000.00 (Seven Million Seven Hundred and Fifty Three Thousand United States Dollars Only). My relationship with Mr. Mark started in 1992 when I was a supervisor in UNION BANK OF NIGERIA PLC , Marina branch.
We met in my social club's annual end of the year party and I introduced him to my bank where he opened this account some few weeks later making me the account officer to the account which he operated until his unfortunate demise. On the 1st of June 2001, Mr. Mark, his wife and their three children were involved in a car accident . All occupants of the vehicle unfortunately lost their lives. Since then I have made several enquiries to locate any of Mr. Mark's extended relatives this has also proved unsuccessful. After these several unsuccessful attempts, to locate any member of his family hence I contacted you. I am contacting you to assist in repatriating the money left behind by Mr. Mark before they get confiscated since the bank has declared the account unserviceable. I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 2years since I was recalled back to Marina Branch as a Senior Manager from a transfer that took me to another branch of the bank.
I therefore seek your consent to present you as the next of kin of the deceased, so that the proceeds of this account valued at $7,753,000.00 (Seven Million Seven Hundred and Fifty Three Thousand United States Dollars Only) can be paid to you and then you and I can share the money. 70% to me and 30% to you. I have access to all necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any claim we may make.
All I require is your honest cooperation to enable us see this deal through. I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. Please get in touch with me through my email or phone and send to me your full name telephone and fax numbers to enable us discuss further about this transaction.
Anticipating your soonest co-operation.
Best regards,
Mr.Martin Uche.
And here was my reply to that e-mail:
Mr. Uche---Small world. I actually knew Mark Johnson years ago and boffed his wife on a couple of occasions. Therefore I am deeply grieved to learn of their demise.
As to the $7,753,000.00 to be paid to me, I prefer they be first used to purchase the new Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds. I currently own $18 million of these bonds and they have paid me 15% yearly interest since I purchased them nearly 3 years ago. These bonds are being used for the renovation of the Brooklyn Bridge and commencing in 2004, tolls will be charged for crossing the Brooklyn Bridge. This is why such a high rate of interest is being paid on these bonds which are backed up by the Brooklyn Bridge as collateral.
Please contact me about investing the $7,753,000.00 into the Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds. If you have any other capital available, I would suggest you invest that into these bonds as well.
I am looking forward to our joint ownership of the Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds. Thank You.---P.J.
Think this reply above was too much over the edge? Well, guess what? Mr. Uche has replied and has expressed interest in buying the Brooklyn Bridge from me. Here is the reply I recieved just a few minutes ago:
Dear P.J.
Thanks very much for your prompt reply to me to my mail and your suggestion is highly welcome. To enable proceed with the transfer of the fund, I will appreciate if you contact me who will handle the transaction on your behalf.
He is Barrister Richard Obi by name and is email address is bar2richardobi@justice.com for the transfer to take place a letter of administration and the death Certificate of the late Mr. M. Johnson has to be obtained the lawyer and a sworn affidavit change of ownership in your favour.
I will appreciate if you forward to the lawyer as a mater of urgency your full name, Telephone/ Fax numbers and your full home/official address to enable him proceed further. The letter of administration and death certificate of the late Mr. Johnson shall be forwarded to you for your perusal. When finally obtained by the lawyer.
I sincerely hope to invest my share into the Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds as you have said, as we shall be working as partners. You can also contact the lawyer through his cell phone number 234-804-2106115for further discussions.
Looking forward to your response.
Your’s faithfully,
Uche.
And here is my reply to this latest e-mail from Mr. Uche:
Hi Marty!---Great to hear from you.
The person handling the transaction on my behalf is my Columbian business associate, Mr. Marco Traficante of the Coca-Eena Importing Company. He will be traveling to Nigeria next month and will conduct the transaction for the Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds in which you have expressed an interest in purchasing.
While he is there, Mr. Traficante will be investigating the market for opening up a Hooters franchise in Nigeria. Have you ever been to a Hooters Restaurant? They serve the most excellent chicken wings there and I think this restaurant would be very popular in your country. Here in the USA, Hooters Restaurant with its owl theme is very popular, perhaps because we revere owls so much over here. Did you know that we even forbid the construction of some dams here because they might harm the habitat of spotted owls? Also all the waitresses must have large eyes to go with the owl theme of the Hooters restaurant (owls are also known as Hooters).
Would you also be interested in becoming our Nigerian partner of the Hooters restaurant? The main thing, in addition to serving up the most excellent chicken wings, is to ensure that all the waitresses have very large eyes to go with the owl theme.
Please let me know if you can meet with Mr. Marco Traficante when he arrives in Nigeria. Thanx.---P.J.
Methinks the authorities over there are also involved in these scams.
You mean you don't have at least one Nigerian of your own who has been sending you this scam e-mail? Most of us get at least a couple of such e-mails per week.
I used to live in Tamarac and Lauderhill.
-PJ
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