Cher's missing wig handed to police

BBC News ^ | March 7, 2003 | BBC News

[CarmelValleyite]

Skank pretty much says it -- and her "real" hair is so thin and damaged it's pathetic to see. Hang around Malibu to get a glimpse -- she toodles around with her entourage frequently... usually spouting off profanities in a loud voice, but having a hissy fit if any photographer tries to take a picture... Go figure.

[sheik yerbouty]

"Wished"

[archy]

Cher always was and will ever be a skank

Yeah, but you've got to admit that she does look better with the wig in place.

[harry palmer]

Cher's Brain Found

AP
Cher's brain, stolen from the star's dressing room during a concert tour, was found today when her manager, Bruce LeBruce, spotted an unusual ad in a local paper.

"The ad read 'brain for sale, good condition never been used'", said Mr LeBruce, "and I knew immediately we had located Cher's brain!"

The star was told the good news today at an anti-war rally, "I didn't even know it was missing until they told me it was found!" exclaimed the diva.