Posted on 07/27/2006 6:33:16 AM PDT by Ebenezer
Donald Tremblay, who is the Public Relations Director for Main Events, a professional boxing promoter, writes from Brooklyn, New York, and can be reached at dtremblay@mainevents.com.
"If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the stray? And if he finds it, amen, I say to you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that did not stray." -- Matthew 18:12-13
Over the years, in her zeal to create administratively efficient parishes and dioceses, the American Catholic Church has forgotten the above Gospel lesson. It is a lesson the Church better quickly remember since the future of Catholicism in this nation may hinge on recovering those men of the flock who have strayed from the fold.
How low are male Mass-attendance numbers? George Barna's Index of Leading Spiritual Indicators states the following: "Of Americans in the mid-1990s…women are twice as likely to attend a church service during any given week."
For years the American Catholic Church has operated with the attitude, "Our doors are always open," and "If people need us they know where to find us." Well, that approach has failed, and it is time the Church follow the evangelical examples set forth by Jesus Christ and by Pope John Paul II.
Jesus recognized that the only effective way to reach people is to meet them in their own backyards. Consider the recruiting tactics Jesus used. Case in point: Matthew's Gospel describes how Jesus visits the tax office of Matthew and eats with "many tax collectors and sinners" (Mt. 9:10). Imagine the shock and appreciation of those men and women upon realizing that this holy man was breaking Judaic law and risking slander in order to evangelize them. Needless to say, Jesus' outreach worked since Matthew became one of His 12 Apostles.
Pope John Paul II used the same approach with his Polish brethren, adding to the Church's flock by annually vacationing with a group of about 200 laymen. In Witness to Hope, a biography of John Paul II written by George Weigel, the late Pope explains why he chose activities such as kayaking, hiking, and skiing to develop bonds with this group of physically adventurous lay Catholics: "The duty of a priest is to live with people, everywhere they are, to be with them in everything but sin." Again, meeting people in their own backyard.
Thankfully, some of the clergy are beginning to recognize the necessity of shepherding -- particularly among men. "It is critical," says Msgr. David Cassato of St. Athanasius Church in Brooklyn, N.Y. "You have to go to the marketplace and talk to the people. Recently I walked along 18th Ave. [in Brooklyn] and visited the coffee shops where men drink espresso and play card games. I talked to the men and got to know them. They see you as approachable and they respond. God's graces work, but you have to help them."
In fairness to the clergy, it is difficult to play the role of evangelizer in the U.S. with the growing shortage of priests. Being one of only two priests -- or in many cases being the only priest -- responsible for the spiritual and financial health of an entire parish can be an overwhelming experience that leaves time for little else. Still, with Mass attendance low among males, and with the ramifications of the Church sexual abuse crisis (largely homosexual) yet to be resolved, which turns men off, something must be done lest the flock flee for good.
Part of the problem appears to be the insularity of the clergy. By and large, the majority of the clergy spend their days interacting solely with other members of the priesthood and with lay members who are active in the parish. The needs and desires of the lapsed male Catholic are alien to the clergy, as evidenced by the typical outreach programs they suggest, such as Bible study groups, prayer sessions, etc. These programs will never be successful in any meaningful way because they rely on the flock to voluntarily return to the fold, instead of forcing the shepherd to go out and retrieve the flock.
This year Msgr. Cassato will hold his fifth annual golf tournament. Golf tournaments provide excellent opportunities to interact with the male members of the community, both lapsed and otherwise. Many people don't realize the amount of business that is conducted and completed on the nation's golf courses. Men return from these outings feeling connected to those with whom they've competed. The Church can use a similar strategy to ingratiate herself with men.
Other activities such as "Cigar Nights" and "Monday Night Football Nights" can provide similar opportunities for a bond to form between the clergy and the male community. Msgr. Cassato has held 10 "Cigar Nights" and he describes these gatherings as "a man's night out." Over time, the clergy can take the next step and encourage those males to return to the Church.
Too often the Church has portrayed Jesus as effeminate. But Jesus, who flipped over the money-changers' tables, is the Jesus with whom men can identify. The Jesus who is portrayed solely as one who eternally "turns the other cheek" has little in common with the American male. Denver Archdiocesan Chancellor Francis Maier summarizes the feelings of many men: "Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ is a good example of male identification. It affected men because they looked at James Caviezel as Jesus and said, ‘That is a man.' He is a muscular carpenter; there are no doubts about his sexual identity." In the movie, Jesus was not the androgynous figure He has unfortunately been portrayed as in the Church. He was a man who faced down the authorities, antagonizing them, rebuking them, and challenging them to such a degree that it resulted in His suffering perhaps the cruelest death of all: crucifixion. Ultimately, He embraced the value that men hold highest: giving one's life for a cause. A man will sacrifice his life for his family, for his country, for his friends, and even for his religion. It is this Jesus with whom men identify, this Jesus who speaks to their masculinity.
Finally, the Church must reconsider how she interacts with men ceremonially, particularly at Sunday Mass. Many men fled the Church in response to the changes instituted by the hierarchy following Vatican II. Music is number one on the list of changes that disenchanted men. The general opinion of Church music today is that it is either of poor quality regardless of its message, or that it is sentimental at the expense of being reverential. Leon Podles, author of The Church Impotent: The Feminization of Christianity, points out that much of the Church's liturgical music consists of "love ballads" with Jesus' name inserted as the object of that love. This is particularly so, he argues, at Communion. Any man who attends Mass regularly can attest to this pathetic reality. The Church needs to recognize that no heterosexual man will sing love ballads to another man, even if that man is God incarnate.
The Church must return to more reverential music, such as Gregorian chants and monastic chants. Both are spiritually uplifting and inflame the fires of mystical awe that men feel toward Almighty God. That mystical awe can be further stimulated by recovering liturgical rituals that were forsaken following Vatican II (see Tom Bethell's Sept. 2005 Last Things column, "Refugees From the Vernacular Mass," where, of the Tridentine Latin Mass at St. Mary Mother of God Church in Washington, D.C., he states: "I tell you, this is a church men don't hate going to.")
Men also generally hold a natural distaste for praying aloud. They find it distracting, and would much rather pray silently and express their reverence through rituals such as burning incense and candles, genuflecting, and bowing. And men don't like to hold hands with other men at the Our Father.
Interestingly, according to Leon Podles, parishes that have provided these changes have witnessed a change in attendance: "Different writers have noticed that in churches where the old Tridentine Mass is practiced there is a 50% [attendance] split between men and women [in the congregation]."
Should the Church institute any or all of these changes, she will be sending a signal that it is time to recover the male flock that has been scattered and abandoned. Maybe then men will find the welcome they need to return to the Church.
ping
Oh, THANK YOU for mentioning the music. It is too oomy-goomy for me, a woman. How must the manly men feel? Jesus was NOT a touchy-feely, West Coast liberal Metrosexual. Aaaahhhh, thank you for posting this breath of fresh air.
There's some medicine in the book, and it's not easy to take.
Boy, are ever right!
As for as my recollection goes, this DID start with women's lib, women ministers, "gay" lib for lesbians, fault-free, easy divorce, "I-am-woman-hear-me...." and affirmative racism/discrimination (quotas for minnorities and women).
The Catholic Church started feminizing right along with the rest of the country. [I am a woman.]
Sappy, soppy music. I liked the old music...mostly because it was beautiful.
We could go back to the most beautiful church music of the 15th, 16th, 17th, 19th or 19th century, you know, the AGELESS music, where men would feel the desire to sing along.
I was briefly involved with my parish's "men's club" but withdrew in disappointment. It was more about helping the parish and attached school with manual labor and donating money than with raising men's spirituality and faith. The monthly meetings provided beer, hard liquor, and a chance for the men to use foul language and talk about hunting, fishing, or trucks. No talks about our obligations as fathers, husbands, and sons; no talks about seeking spiritual guidance through prayer, Scripture, or Church documents; no talks about the temptations men face.
I'm not some Vidal Sassoon metrosexual, mind you, but men who don't engage in the above worldly interests don't find these men's clubs welcoming. It's almost as if, being segregated from the rest of parish life, the members of these organizations try to compensate by overdoing the macho thing. I don't know; maybe it's only in my parish.
*Really? I wonder what the millions of men in Monasteries throughout history would think of that statement
They find it distracting,
*Says who?
and would much rather pray silently and express their reverence through rituals such as burning incense and candles, genuflecting, and bowing.
*Says who? One can do all of those things and still pray out loud.
And men don't like to hold hands with other men at the Our Father.
*Who likes to hold hands with strangers?
Matthew 5:14-16In a secular environment, we evangelize best by good example. If we set a good example, the questions and opportunities for evangelization will come."You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
1 Peter 3:15Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect
Got this e-mail from Steve Wood's dads.org today:
Here’s the rub about Catholic parenting seminars: men are noticeably absent. Can you blame them if speakers try to get men to act like Mr. Mom? Rather, at least some guys will respond to a seminar flyer that includes a bullet that says, “How a fishing boat can make you a more effective Christian father.”Getting men to attend a parenting conference is hard work and many are tempted to sidestep the challenge. Before succumbing to this temptation, pay heed to St. Paul’s warning: He said, “Fire will test what sort of work each one has done. If the work which any man has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. If any man's work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved” (1 Corinthians 3:13-15).
Let’s apply St. Paul’s teaching to family work. Cardinal Bertone asserts that without the father “the entire architecture of the family crumbles.” If Cardinal Bertone is right (and I think he is), then all fatherless family work will ultimately be reduced to ashes. On the other hand, keep fathers in focus throughout all your family work and you will have enduring success and a divine reward.
Take heart, you can get men to attend a parenting seminar if:
1. You aggressively recruit them. Otherwise, wives and godly grandmothers will make up the majority of the attendees.
2. Offer a men-only seminar. This remains the best way to recruit men to a conference on fathering topics. (Note: a men’s talk during a couples’ conference is extremely ineffective. I’ve quit doing this.)
3. Charge a fee. Men evaluate the worth of a seminar by its cost. Offering a free seminar makes it seem worthless to many men and hurts male attendance. Female attendance increases at free seminars, but getting women to attend is not your prime problem. Yet it’s a good idea to offer free registration to single moms at a parents’ seminar.
4. Provide childcare in an ultra-clean environment during the seminar. Otherwise, dads will volunteer to stay home and watch the kids while his wife attends. If you want parents with babies to attend (it’s critical to reach out to these parents), your parish should have a silent paging system to alert concerned mothers if they are needed in the nursery. Most mothers will never be paged. Even so, a mother will feel much more secure in using a nursery if she knows she can be contacted if needed. (Search Google for a wide selection of parent pager systems. One such product is www.parentseeker.com.)
5. Don’t expect a bulletin notice to bring out the parents who need it most. As a former pastor, I can testify that anything in a church bulletin remains top secret. Get creative, use color with a professional design, advertise. One parish with a successful conference offered free coffee and donuts after the Masses with high family attendance. While the parents were munching on donuts, recruiters circulated through the crowd giving out flyers and personal invitations.
6. Have an aggressive campaign where parishioners invite their friends, neighbors, and fellow parishioners. Years ago I worked with a local committee of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association to fill Tampa stadium for a Graham crusade. An intentional plan of friends inviting friends was the primary mechanism used to fill a stadium.
7. Ask your priest to actively promote the conference and state in advance that he plans to attend the entire event. The priests that do this almost always have better attendance. I realize that so many pastors are over-burdened, but there are few things that are absolutely necessary in the life of a parish and reaching fathers of families comes close to the top of the list.
I, too, wish my parish used the Adoramus Hymnal, but I don't hold out much hope.
I always check the hymns listed, and if they are unfamiliar to me I look at the copyright date. If it is past 1965, you can almost guarantee it will be a stinker.
Then they wonder why no one sings along! HA!
This is a problem in all denominations. Church has followed the culture, and become focused on women. Going to church is often considered "effeminate", and to be honest it is sometimes.
Which is why I love the old red hymnal (LCMS) service were I go.
Mozart isn't good enough for the AmChurch- only Jevvy Castrati know how to write for this bunch.
Also, why aren't nuns nuns anymore? I got into an argument with "Miss Pat"! about homosexual priests when I said that these were not proper candidates for the priesthood.
I agree with most of what this article says but when I got to the bottom, then I realized that it was written by a traditionalist, who thinks that returning to the Tridentine Mass will solve ALL of the Church's problems.
I used to subscribe to the New Oxford Review but I did not renew my subscription because this magazine is just too extremist in its views.
I don't think men mind praying out loud as much as they hate the evangelical pose seen in so many churches and the crappy music. The Catholic Church in America and Western Europe has been sucked dry of all its masculinity by effete leaders and namby-pamby PC crap. Traditionalists associate the same leaders with modern liturgy and "progressive" theology because the same leaders brought both. Do not fault the body of Christ because the head was sick.
Do you wear a belted man-purse aka fanny pack aka waist pack? If so, then you are definitely metrosexual. But don't worry, those waist packs are incredibly handy and I wear them despite constant harrassment on this topic in the FR.
NOR is clearly a paleoconservative Catholic publication that commonly rants against Bush, neoconservatives, Vatican II, and the war in Iraq; in other words, it is something Pat Buchanan and Joe Sobran would enjoy reading. If there is a reason I post NOR articles, it is because I embrace "cafeteria paleoconservatism". I pick and choose those views from NOR, Pat, or Joe that I agree with.
Is there an orthodox (but not extremist) Catholic magazine you can recommend? I am thinking of subscribing to Crisis, but I distrust America, Commonweal, Catholic Digest, and U.S. Catholic.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.