Ah, but were you a “once saved always saved” Arminian, or a “once saved, but keep watching your step” Arminian? I would suppose there is a great difference, assurance-wise.
Then I had children and I needed some answers.
Thankfully, God had earlier sent me a husband who came to know the doctrines of grace before I did. When we married he joined my Presbyterian church, but then he ran far ahead of me in his understanding of God and Scripture. By his good example I saw how much happier and confident he was in his faith. But it wasn't until I had children that I realized how little I knew before and how much I had to learn.
I can honestly say the greatest truth I have ever known is that God has chosen His family before the foundation of the world. That understanding doesn't keep anyone out; it just clarifies how anyone gets there. "Salvation is of the Lord."
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." -- Romans 8:28"For the children being not yet born, neither having done any good or evil, that the purpose of God according to election might stand, not of works, but of him that calleth" -- Romans 9:11