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To: goat granny

As the father of 7 I can attest that alnmost every time I meet somebody new while with my children (or if discussion of chilkdren comes up as small talk) that person makes an overt remark about how many children I have. Most often the remarks are due to their surprise - and delight or disappointment that anyone would or could have such a large family. So I do understand - its a bit like seeing someone in a wheelchair in that people are simply not used to that reality and don’t know how to react.

The remarks fall into 2 attitudes:

1. Why do you have so many kids - why don’t you use birth control?

2. Wow that is wonderful, I have __ kids. Follwed by “Wish I could have had more” or “if I had it to do again I would have had more” or something similar.

So, yes, I know for certain many people who are childless due to birth control.

Also, it is pretty obvious that taking strong hormones for 10 years or more (often starting around age 17 or 18) to shut down a perfectly healthy reproductive system is bound to have some impact on the long term health of that same system once you decide you would like it to perform as designed.


60 posted on 10/25/2010 6:18:22 AM PDT by Notwithstanding
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To: Notwithstanding
Love reply #2. I also have made passing remarks at people with children...usually is with small babies telling the parents how beautiful their child is....It brings ear to ear smiles on their faces....recently in Krogers there was a man alone shopping with infant twins....this big burly man with arms full of tattoos. We talked for a few minutes and told him how lucky he was to have twins, and his face beamed...but at no time have I ever discussed BC with a stranger...thats a good way to get a smashed face....

When I was raising my kids, one of my girlfriends had 9 another close neighbor also had 5 like me and she was baptist. Years later we laughed about that when I told her that I told my priest that I knew she was catholic cause she had 5 kids..... I think casual conversation as you talk about is quite different than a in depth discussion on why you don't use BC with a stranger.. Its still no one's business except the 2 involved...

For me just the though of discussing someones BC without an invitation to discuss it is stupid. It also is not for me to judge if they do or don't....

Your answer has no judgmental aspects to it...and was a delight to read....7 makes you more experienced than me with only 5. They are all in their late 40's to early 50's and have given me 13 most excellent grandchildren....

PS If any one made a comment to me like your #1, they'd get a not so pleasant ear-full...

126 posted on 10/25/2010 1:39:44 PM PDT by goat granny
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