I am Laughing OUT LOUD! You said you wished you had been there the first time someone grabbed at MY hand! How funny!
I can tell you it took me a time or two to believe what I was having to endure, before I put a stop to it. The resentment in me built and I finally decided to lock my hands from the very beginning of Mass and keep a prayer posture, of bowed head and closed eyes, through every word of the Mass, which is actually easy since every word of the Mass is a prayer.
I must have the appearance of a saint(LOL) because no one dares to touch me now, even if sitting right next to me, but then how would I know, as I have my eyes closed! Mass has become much more peaceful and my eyes are now CLEAVAGE FREE and Burmuda shorts free, and tatoo free! Ah, the advantages of closed eyes.
Have you ever noticed that the Our Father never actually ends at its Amen, but a prayer continues? Frozen in place in prayer posture, I get to appreciate the following continued prayer, while others are releasing from hand jive, straightening their hem line, coughing, and never seem to hear the continued prayer. After all, they haven’t been listening, but instead have been distracted by doing the hand jive thing with strangers. Hilarious. Thanks.