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Following The Truth: Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers? (Catholic or Open)
CE.com ^ | September 18th, 2009 | Gary Zimak

Posted on 12/26/2011 9:04:02 AM PST by Salvation

Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

September 18th, 2009 by Gary Zimak

Have you ever felt that God wasn’t answering your prayers? Perhaps you have been praying for the conversion of a loved one, the physical healing of a close friend, a new job, a broken relationship, etc. Despite many prayers, the outcome wasn’t what you expected. In some cases, you may have just given up and stopped praying. You may question the validity of Jesus’ words, “Ask and you shall receive”. Does prayer really make a difference or is it just something that makes us feel good? Let’s take a look at prayer and why it is important that we not only pray, but “pray without ceasing” (1 Thes 5:17).

According to St. John Damascene, a 6th century bishop and doctor of the Church, “Prayer is the raising of one’s mind and heart to God or the requesting of good things from God.” St. Thérèse of Lisieux stated, “For me, prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy.” The Catechism of the Catholic Church describes Christian prayer as, “a covenant relationship between God and man in Christ” (CCC 2564). While we are most familiar with prayer of petition, the above statements make it obvious that there is more to prayer than merely asking God for something.

To put it in simple terms, prayer is a means of communicating and sharing with God. The Catechism discusses several different forms of prayer, including Blessing, Adoration, Petition, Intercession, Thanksgiving and Praise. While each of these methods of prayer uses a different approach, they all involve an encounter between God and man. Understanding that encounter will help us to better comprehend the meaning of prayer in our lives. Utilizing several of these methods will allow us to grow closer to the Lord, which is the ultimate objective of prayer. As  we turn to the Lord in prayer, we’ll begin to increase our desire for the things of Heaven and focus more on letting God’s will guide our lives.

must make time for prayer. Even if it means giving up 15-30 minutes of your leisure time — some quiet time with the Lord is a necessity! Prayer doesn’t have to be formal and it doesn’t have to take place inside of a church. We can talk to Jesus like we would speak to any of our friends. He wants to know all of our worries and concerns. Conversing with the Lord should be the main foundation of our prayer life.

We can then build on that foundation by expanding our definition of prayer. Origen, one of the early Church fathers observed, “He ‘prays without ceasing’ who unites prayer to works and good works to prayer. Only in this way can we consider as realizable the principle of praying without ceasing.” In other words, we can turn all of our work into prayer simply by offering it to the Father. The traditional Morning Offering provides an excellent means of offering our work to the Lord and can be said in less than a minute! By employing this technique, we are even able to pray while we work. While this form of prayer should never replace our quiet time with God, it provides us with a means to “pray constantly” throughout the day.

According to the Catechism , “The habitual difficulty in prayer is distraction” (CCC 2729). This is a problem common to all forms of prayer. Whether you’re in a church, praying the rosary in your car or praying before the Blessed Sacrament, you will encounter distractions at some point. These distractions provide us, according to the Catechism, with an idea of “what we are attached to” (CCC 2729) and give us an opportunity to choose the Lord over the distraction. When these thoughts occur, we should simply turn our minds to God and continue praying. Another common difficulty that we may encounter is dryness, which is a lack of feeling when we pray. This is something that many of the saints struggled with and is best overcome by perseverance. We need to rely on our faith during these times and struggle to continue praying, no matter how we feel. Bouts of dryness provide us with an opportunity to love God for who He is, not for the good feeling that we may experience during prayer.

As mentioned earlier, one of the most common complaints when we pray is that God doesn’t answer our prayers. This complaint usually occurs with prayers of petition and provides an honest look into the reality of our human nature. The Catechism puts things into perspective with the following comments:

In the first place, we ought to be astonished by this fact: when we praise God or give him thanks for his benefits in general, we are not particularly concerned whether or not our prayer is acceptable to him. On the other hand, we demand to see the results of our petitions. What is the image of God that motivates our prayer: an instrument to be used? or the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ? (CCC 2735).

When we pray, are we truly lifting our hearts to Almighty God or are we looking to “get what we want”? If we really trust in His will, we should be satisfied with whatever answer we receive. Our frustration arises when we think that we know better than God. We decide how our prayers should be answered and are not pleased when the Lord’s answer may differ from ours. While Jesus does promise that we will receive an answer when we ask (Mt 7:8), He doesn’t promise that we will get what we ask for…Instead, He promises that we will get what we need . Jesus assures us of this when He states, “Which one of you would hand his son a stone when he asks for a loaf of bread, or a snake when he asks for a fish? If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask Him.” (Mt 7:9-11) Still not convinced? Scripture gives us a very clear explanation for why we may not get what we request, “You ask but do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” (James 4:3) We could save ourselves a lot of aggravation by accepting this advice and seeking to discern God’s will for our lives. In doing so, we would get a clearer idea of those “things” that God wants us to have.

Knowing God’s will for our lives can sometimes be difficult, but a few basic principles can be very helpful. For one thing, it would be wrong to pray for something that goes against a teaching of the Church. For example, praying for the success of in-vitro fertilization or an invalid marriage would not be examples of praying with God’s will in mind. God never wills anything that is prohibited by His Church. While He does respect our free will and permits us to do things that are not in line with the commandments, praying for sinful things is not an example of praying with God’s will in mind.

Second, we should append all of our prayer requests with, “if it is your will.” If we truly mean what we say, we’ll have no problem accepting whatever God sends…even if it wasn’t what we asked for. The ultimate example of praying in this manner was given by Our Lord as he suffered in the garden prior to His arrest and crucifixion. His prayer shows us the art of praying in union with the will of the Father. “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet, not as I will, but as you will.” (Mt 26:39)

While we do not know exactly why prayer is effective, we do know that it is important. Jesus instructed us to pray and prayed Himself on many occasions. The reason that it works is known only to God and is beyond our understanding. Our main concern should be that we continue to pray as often as possible. Most importantly, the next time that you are tempted to say that God doesn’t answer your prayers, remember that He can answer in a few different ways — “Yes”, “No” or “Not yet” are all valid answers! Therefore, when we complain that God doesn’t answer our prayers, don’t we really mean, “God doesn’t answer my prayers…the way that I want”?

Lord, help me to trust in your perfect will for my life. May I always be content with your answers to my prayers, even if I don’t understand them. Amen.



TOPICS: Apologetics; Catholic; Prayer; Theology
KEYWORDS: catholic; prayer
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To: Salvation

Since the poster left this discussion “Open,” I will offer another, but similar perspective from another religion.

We Mahayana Buddhists pray to the Buddhas mostly for help in our spiritual practices. We ask them to purify our minds of obstructing thoughts, and to bless our minds with helpful thoughts, especially blessings that will ripen latent spiritual tendencies. Our motivation is to become Buddhas ourselves, because only Buddhas can be of the ultimate help in relieving others from their suffering and bringing them pure happiness.

In terms of “unanswered” prayers in this regard, we assume full responsibility: We check our own mind, our motivation, the purity of our request, the obstacles to spiritual progress we can remove on our own, the lack of effort we are making to ripen our latent spiritual tendencies - all of which are simply the results of our own karmic tendencies. We would agree with the Christian tenet that “God helps those who help themselves.”

In terms of prayers made on behalf of others, with an appreciation for the full, complex, eternal sweep of karma, as well as the long and extensive path to achieve Buddhahood, free from all suffering, we offer our prayers with pretty much the same attitude Christians use: “Your will, not my will.” Only Buddhas are omniscient. Only they have the wisdom to see the path each person must take to ultimate happiness, free of all suffering. If we simply pray for such happiness for others, rather than pretending we know the short-term particulars that will get them there, we can rest sure that their needs are being met when we pray.


21 posted on 12/26/2011 10:05:26 AM PST by dagogo redux (A whiff of primitive spirits in the air, harbingers of an impending descent into the feral.)
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To: nathanbedford

I like “tempering.” Sometimes beating, sometimes thrusting into fire, sometimes plunging into cold water. Tempering.


22 posted on 12/26/2011 10:13:46 AM PST by Mad Dawg (Jesus, I trust in you.)
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To: Salvation

What if.. “NO” or “You can’t have that” or simply “you ask wrongly”
IS THE ANSWER...


23 posted on 12/26/2011 10:27:19 AM PST by hosepipe (This propaganda has been edited to include some fully orbed hyperbole...)
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To: hosepipe

1 John 3 gives us a few conditions for answered prayer:

21 Beloved, if our hearts don’t condemn us, we have boldness toward God; 22 and whatever we ask, we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do the things that are pleasing in his sight. 23 This is his commandment, that we should believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and love one another, even as he commanded.


24 posted on 12/26/2011 10:37:39 AM PST by aimhigh
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To: aimhigh

Like I said..


25 posted on 12/26/2011 10:41:20 AM PST by hosepipe (This propaganda has been edited to include some fully orbed hyperbole...)
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To: Salvation

In all fairness, what does one ask God? A lot of humbleness can be earned if someone writes down a single prayer request they want to make and actually think about it for a single day.

Say a loved one is sick. You can go many directions from there, about how they are sick, why they are sick, what treatments exist for them. And you need to ask yourself that this is their life, do you truly want to invoke God to change their life?

People have been designed to be infants, young, adult and old. In their lives they face challenges, success and failure, and the possibility of many different infirmities, some they will overcome, and some they will not. Eventually everyone will physically die.

Do you disagree that this is the way things should be, enough so that you want God to change it?

And back to this being your prayer. Are your motives pure? Or are they because you are afraid of life and death, loneliness and pain, and when you see it in another, it invokes your self-pity and self-importance. Is your prayer to God that may what is happening to them never happens to you?

Are you praying to God for bad or petty reasons?

Perhaps the proper mood for prayer is the belief that it may be the last prayer in your life, so you had better make it a good one.


26 posted on 12/26/2011 10:44:12 AM PST by yefragetuwrabrumuy
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To: Salvation
Very true. I remember saying the Serenity Prayer about every five minutes after my husband died just to get me through the day. The last line — “And the wisdom to know the difference.”

Recently my wife was in the Hospital with a recurrence of a bacterial infection that caused her to have an altered mental status. The Doctors kept trying to tell me that it was a late onset mental disorder. I prayed that prayer it seemed like every 5 minutes until they came around to my way of thinking. I kept being persistent but polite and reiterating the facts of the case.

That prayer got me to sleep at night along with the Divine mercy chaplet.

27 posted on 12/26/2011 10:54:45 AM PST by verga (We get what we tolerate and increase that which we reward)
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To: Salvation

Why doesn’t God answer my prayers?

Because you don’t understand the nature of prayer.


28 posted on 12/26/2011 12:19:54 PM PST by SaxxonWoods (....The days are long, but the years are short.....)
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To: Salvation

God always answers our prayers...But sometimes the answer is “no.”


29 posted on 12/26/2011 12:31:17 PM PST by NakedRampage (Puttin' the "stud" in Bible study)
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To: verga

Sorry to hear about your wife. What is the prognosis now?


30 posted on 12/26/2011 1:53:09 PM PST by Salvation ("With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26)
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To: yefragetuwrabrumuy

**In all fairness, what does one ask God?**

First of all, give THANKS.

Thank Jesus for being there with you.
Thank him for your family.
Thank him for your belief in God.
Thank him for _______________________you fill in the blanks.

Then I always think some praise is due.
Jesus, you are most holy among men.
Jesus, you are Son of God and Son of Mary
Jesus Christ, only Son of the Father
and so forth———————

Then I spend some time in silence listening.

Then I might get around to asking for God’s guidance (wisdom as mentioned above) with ________________________ you can fill that in too.

And I go back to the praise.

Then the silence and listening.

Then petitions for my family, sick friends, etc.

Then more silence and listening.

Then final words of praise or a song of a Psalm.

Then Amen. And keep quiet for about a half hour afterward.

This can take up an entire hour. But it is worth it.

ALWAYS start with thanksgiving.


31 posted on 12/26/2011 2:03:47 PM PST by Salvation ("With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26)
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To: Salvation
Sorry to hear about your wife. What is the prognosis now?

Thank you, she is much better now. The short term memory is a little weak, but the long term is improving rapidly.

32 posted on 12/26/2011 2:03:58 PM PST by verga (We get what we tolerate and increase that which we reward)
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To: Salvation
Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

1 Kings 8:28 Yet give attention to your servant's prayer and his plea for mercy, O LORD my God. Hear the cry and the prayer that your servant is praying in your presence this day.

Proverbs 3:6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.frefre

Jeremiah 32:16 "After I had given the deed of purchase to Baruch son of Neriah, I prayed to the LORD:

Daniel 6:10 Now when Daniel learned that the decree had been published, he went home to his upstairs room where the windows opened toward Jerusalem. Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, just as he had done before.

Matthew 6:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?

Matthew 6:27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Matthew 6:28 "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.

Matthew 6:31 So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'

Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Ephesians 6:18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

1 Timothy 2:1 I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone--

1 Timothy 5:5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help.

33 posted on 12/26/2011 2:04:44 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: verga

I will be saying a Divine Mercy and Rosary for her and others. Amen.


34 posted on 12/26/2011 2:08:35 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: verga

I will be saying a Divine Mercy and Rosary for her and others. Amen.


35 posted on 12/26/2011 2:09:18 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: johngrace

I hate when it repeats. Good Grief!


36 posted on 12/26/2011 2:12:58 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: Salvation
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.

Technically the prayers are not unanswered any more then your child's request for a slice of cake before dinner is unanswered.

"Not now" is an answer.

"No" is an answer.

"I have something else in mind for you" is also an answer.

The most heartbreaking answer God can give for Him and for you is, "I can only offer." Human free will when we are praying for the salvation of a loved one has to be taken into account.

37 posted on 12/26/2011 2:20:27 PM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear (*Philosophy lesson 117-22b: Anyone who demands to be respected is undeserving of it.*)
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To: dagogo redux

You seem to forget its the personal true God to true God that we pray to as Lord of Lords. Not wish upon a star to make “feel good” only wishes. Some mumbo jumbo wish mediation.

We would agree with the Christian tenet that “God helps those who help themselves.”


38 posted on 12/26/2011 2:26:17 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: johngrace
You seem to forget its the personal true God to true God that we pray to as Lord of Lords. Not wish upon a star to make “feel good” only wishes. Some mumbo jumbo wish mediation. "We would agree with the Christian tenet that “God helps those who help themselves.”

No Such tenet. People mistakenly declare this by mistake. not in scripture.

39 posted on 12/26/2011 2:29:29 PM PST by johngrace (I am a 1 John 4! Christian- declared at every Sunday Mass ,Divine Mercy and Rosary prayers!)
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To: verga

Praise the Lord for that recovery! Prayers answered, I’m sure, perhaps not exactly as you might have wished. But we cannot judge God’s will, can we?


40 posted on 12/26/2011 2:32:52 PM PST by Salvation ("With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26)
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