Here’s a comment on the wwweb:TFS-plh posted on Mar. 24, 2011.
I want to ditto Pat’s gratitude. A female sibling one and one half years younger than I was born with congenital issues that left her a vegetable. She lived 5 years. These were the years my mother needed extra comfort from her husband, but he kept his distance secondary to wanting to maintain abstinence so another child wouldn’t complicate their lives more. Mom had enough to do caring for this non-responsive child, she didn’t need more. At the time all I understood was that I liked the comfort of my mother sleeping with me. At that time in history there were no support groups and because the situation was so painful and no one knew what to do they stayed away. And then Dad kept his distance also. Mom never recovered emotionally. She grew into a screaming, ranting bitter old lady. Dad just shook his head in confusion. Because Mom was such a hand full, though he loved her dearly, during the last few days of his life he didn’t have the energy to deal with her so he refused to have her at his bedside.
Abtinence was the opposite of what my parents needed to survive this life - but because Mom was a loyal Catholic other methods were out of the question.
http://ncronline.org/news/vatican/new-birth-control-commission-papers-reveal-vaticans-hand?page=1
No Catholics worthy of the Name quote the National Catholic Reporter in support of their viewpoint.
“Abtinence was the opposite of what my parents needed to survive this life - but because Mom was a loyal Catholic other methods were out of the question.’
It’s not clear to me if you are talking about your own parents or not, but clearly they were not listening to the Church. Withholding sex by a partner for what ever reason is a sin against marriage and will earn you an annulment...
I think the big tragedy in that story is that the Mother and Father didn’t ask for help and didn’t get any help. Christians should be able to help each other with situations like this. I can see where this would make someone bitter, but even in a world without contraception, there are choices which alleviate strain, and help to heal.
I have a friend whose daughter was mentally ill. When she and her husband were repeatedly having to take her to hospitals, other families babysat her four other children, no matter how sudden the call was, and got them to their activities. It would have been unbearable without the help of friends. The daughter is now an adult and my friend is still doing things for other people, in gratitude for all the people who helped her.