My neighbors wife is spoiled rotten. Spends like a drunken lotto winner.
Her husband tells me for her birthday she wants something that goes from 0-200 fast, and didn’t care what color it was.
I suggested he buy her a bathroom scale.
I actually fell for this one:
Hubby was gassing up the car in Linn Co, IA.
Woman stops and asks him for directions “How do I get to 380?”
Hubby replies: “Have you considered Weight Watchers?”