You are entirely correct in your assessment of trads. I am active in the trad movement and there is, as you suggested, very strong sentiment regarding the TLM position. This includes contempt for the n.o. heirarchy because of their attitude toward us and our families. Most of us can live with the n.o. Mass and don't look to it's abrogation. Why would I care how you worship? We need parishes however that allow us guarantee of the Mass as well as a parish life, ie. a priest that we can talk to when there is a death in the family or some other crisis, a guarantee to a Requiem Mass for our families without begging(and being denied it), and all the other frustrations that come from being the outcasts that we are made to be. Being continually denied the Mass, the Sacraments, and a parish life as we feel we deserve creates a sort of pathology that comes from the continual frustration of trying to work within the system. This is a frustration that often disappears when a trad gives up and attends an SSPX chapel.
We need parishes however that allow us guarantee of the Mass as well as a parish life, ie. a priest that we can talk to when there is a death in the family or some other crisis, a guarantee to a Requiem Mass for our families without begging(and being denied it), and all the other frustrations that come from being the outcasts that we are made to be.Reading all the frustration that you, and others, have expressed on FR has given me a sense of how deeply your adherence to the 1962 Mass is felt, and, yes, how that Mass needs to be the focal point of a parish that is responsive to your needs (baptisms, funerals, and other sacraments).
Now, I've purposely not mentioned Vatican II, which is problematic to many traditionalists, but is, nonetheless, a development of the Church.
I see a Tridentine Rite as a way to isolate things like Religious Liberty (a development with which, I'm guessing, you disagree) in a Novus Ordo Rite.
You should not have to resort to the SSPX. You should be given a co-equal position with the Eastern and Latin Rites.