Now wait a minute. You are dead set against divorce, but it is OK if a spouse violated some civil law? No divorce except in cases of adultery or speeding tickets? And abuse does not include physically beating someone?
Divorce is allowed in cases of adultery OR in cases of abandonment, primarily by an unbelieving spouse. The violation of civil law was brought into the discussion to show that a lawbreaker, at least a habitual one, is not a believer and if they leave then we can let them go. Other instances of abandonment need to be bounced against the totality of scripture. I know that in the light of scripture adultery does not have to be physical, a person can commit adultery in his heart.
Off topic but spanking is not beating someone. It is not abuse. And it is scripturally commanded.
What you are saying is fine for churches that wish to dissolve the bonds holy matrimony among their parishoners. But it makes no sense for civil proceedings in a non-religious legal setting. I don't want to see judges reading through the Bible to decide the law. I'm certainly willing to admit that the NH standard is perhaps set too high, but whatever standard is set has to be based on civil, not biblical, principals.