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I truly understand, we lost our son to leukemia 10 years ago, we are still together, 18 years, but it has not been easy, we still feel the lost terribly. I think part of the reason why this happens is because one or both couples tend to shut down emotionally. I know I did, I am still fighting for my intimacy with my husband. I want to be close again. I am so afraid of that pain I may feel again if something happens to him.

That leukemia is just so awful, and tho there have been advancements made, still so many children still die for this awful disease...

I think that shutting down emotionally is just one way of allowing us to keep within ourselves, not become intimate and love again, because we just dont want to get hurt again, or feel such very terrible real pain again....I understand completely...

My son died 17yrs ago, 17yrs this August...so the anniversary date of his death is approaching...and its always a bad day for us here...but we try to turn it into a good day, by remembering the happy times...sometimes that works, sometimes it doesnt...

My best to you, and know that I feel so badly for you, as you try to deal with this horrendous part of your life...I will pray for you, as I pray for myself...take care...