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There are insecure men who want to do the Pygmalion thing, and see the woman they settle down with as Eliza Dolittle, too. I have personally had the unpleasant experience twice-three times if you count the fiance who wished I were "white" instead of of hispanic ancestry, and actually tried to get me to pretend it wasn't so. My ex-husband spent 20 years trying to make me into his ideal (weak, obedient sexpot in 'ho clothes) woman until I got totally tired of it, his cheating, and him. And yes, I got the lion's share of the community property because he had disposed of a great deal of money and property without my signature. Texas is not an alimony state, and I didn't want anything else from him, anyway-I have always worked for my money. When another man started doing the same thing, chapter and verse, I broke the engagement in record time. I married my best friend shortly afterward, and have been happy ever since. We have no reason to try to change each other, and besides, we know each other well enough to realize that it would be impossible-we just treat one another like the equals we are. I honestly think if you marry a friend (an equal) issues like change probably won't come up-but if they do, you are buddies, so you can talk about it and no one will be running to a lawyer looking to screw the other.

I had a serious relationship with an "alpha male" who kept his affinity for 13-year-girls hidden from me. LOL, no wonder he was so insistent on my weight... Like you, I went to my best friend who definitely isn't an "alpha male"... he isn't the life of the party--in fact, he plays D&D... but he is sweet, gentle, nice, and I have zero doubt he will cheat on me. This alpha male thing is part of everyone's inherent attraction to sinful activities. Women, sadly, don't learn that males who give them the most thrill are also the males who will burn them the most.

My roommate met a very handsome guy, this guy invited her on an all-expenses-paid air & hotel trip to New York two day after they met. When she returned, she told me of the whole deal and was furious he only wanted sex. I was speechless at her stupidity and naivete (although she had extensive... experience).

And yes, I got the lion's share of the community property because he had disposed of a great deal of money and property without my signature.

And here is the crux of the issue. You took the lion's share of the property at the divorce, but who earned the money? Were you both working, or were you raising kids at home, or were you relaxing at home while he worked his butt off? Now, if this were a community effort on a business you both started, this split would be fair (as he "had disposed of a great deal of money and property without my signature". No question there.

If you were home, raising kids; again I would agree with the settlement. In that you had sacrificed earning an income to raise a family.

However, if you were working part time, no kids, and at home, relaxing by the pool, watching Soap Opera's and lounging about; this was unfair.

The law does little to differentiate, but there is a world of difference in my book. For example, remember Johnny Carson's divorces? His wive's are taking home millions/yr for life. They did NOTHING (maids did the housekeeping). Johnny took the risks, put in the hours and used his talents. His wives provided little more than sex and companionship, and that's mighty expensive companionship.