Actually, I want to invite him to my church so he can meet several hundred pointless, dangerous, futile, stupid and sad Christians.
But we do have some awesome bar-b-ques in the summer...!
She might object to eating animal flesh so make sure you have some veggies grilling but then even that might be hurtful since peas have souls too(funny, I used to think that peas have only pods). But seriously, it is completely unacceptable for her to call you by those epithets, not only because of forum rules and ethics but because of fairness too.