Posted on 07/05/2005 6:22:55 AM PDT by writer33
Washington—Republican and Democratic senators urged people and interest groups to resist partisan rhetoric and remain calm while waiting for U.S. President George W. Bush to select a replacement for retiring Justice Sandra Day O’Connor. However, many Democratic senators warned that they were ready for a bloodbath if Bush picks anyone too extreme.
Since the announcement July 1 that O’Connor will retire, conservative and liberal groups have reportedly been preparing for a contentious fight over a replacement for the justice who cast pivotal votes over abortion rights, affirmative action, and the role of religion in public life.
Sen. Arlen Specter noted that these interest groups were too divisive and counterproductive. “It would be very useful for the country if the rhetoric were to be toned down,” Arlen Specter, a Pennsylvania Republican and chairman of the Judiciary Committee, commented on NBC’s Meet the Press. “Can’t we all just get along? Bush needs to do the moderate thing here. We don’t want no stinkin’ extremists on the court.”
Bush won’t name a replacement before he returns July 8 from a summit of the Group of Eight industrial countries, spokesman Scott McClellan remarked July 1. “I know this is keeping Democrats and the media on pins and needles, but they’ll just have to wait. This G-8 summit on Global Warming is far more important than naming a Supreme Court justice.”
If confirmed, the replacement would be the first new member to the high court since 1994 when Harry Blackmun left the court and was replaced by the moderate Stephen Breyer, making the decision all too important to rush into extremism.
Confirmation hearings would follow recent battles between Democrats and Republicans over lower-court nominees, which nearly brought the Senate to a standstill, the country to a screeching halt and nearly sent the markets plummeting, creating soup lines across America. Democrats used filibusters to slow down the confirmation process and indicated they would do it again if Mr. Bush steps out of line.
Senator Dianne Feinstein, a California Democrat, on Fox News Sunday, called use of the filibuster “a last resort.” I don’t think there’s one Democratic member of the United States Senate who would like to see a filibuster,” she screeched. “But don’t think we’ll hesitate to use it if Bush so much as sneezes. We’re not going to have women sent back to dirty coat hangers and back alley abortions, or African Americans sent to the back of the bus. We want our abortion and our affirmative action! We need our kitchen table issues!”
Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy warned that Democrats want to be able to support Bush’s nominee. “But if he wants to have a fight about it, then that’s going to be the case. And I’m ready to come out swinging. No retreat. No surrender, Mr. President!”
Bush’s nominee can anticipate questioning on a wide array of specific topics, such as the 1973 Roe v. Wade abortion rights decision, affairs with any secretaries he or she may have had, his or her medical records, his or her FBI file, and anything else we can think of if the nominee is too conservative, claimed Senator Charles Schumer, D-NY. “The Supreme Court is a lifetime appointment that has enormous power. You don’t think we’re silly enough to let another Scalia slide by do you, asked Schumer. “Like drinking, the choice should be done in moderation, or there’ll be a rumble at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue!
Texas Republican John Cornyn noted that he would not ask nominees specifics about how they would vote on issues. He said that the unrelenting criticism of interest groups from both sides could turn the hearings into a “three-ring circus.” Asking nominees hypothetical questions on how they would decide future cases would reduce the value of the hearings, Cornyn indicated. “And if these Democrats so much as try to go down the filibuster path, I know just where I’m gonna place my size twelve boot! It’ll be the Battle of San Jacinto all over again!”
“Dubya better not select someone that’s too extreme,” fired Sen. John McCain, R-AZ. “Who does he think runs this country? The silly man will never learn. Government by the people, of the people and for the people makes me laugh.”
Despite claims for Americans to remain calm, the frenzy broke out over the Fourth of July weekend, setting the stage for an eye-gouging, chair throwing, body slamming, down and dirty melee for the right to control the Supreme Court.
Democrats, Republicans and the media have placed themselves into positions to slug it out with each other instead of celebrating the birth of a nation, the founders of this great Republic and those who fought to protect it.
Nuthin' wrong with the Senate that a gutta-percha cane wouldn't fix.
Ahhh... I never knew that. I always hear "A woman's right to choose" and I always wonder... choose what?
Yup, I never trusted Specter.
Ah, to sleep, perchance to dream.
it would be helpful if things like this are labeled satire
You can always count on MeCain McVain to screw things up!
nice work though
Bloodbath ~ Bump!
Another good 'un.
God Bless You, a perfect choice, I think John Ashcroft would be just the person to help swing the court back to the original intent.
In addition, we can sell tickets for the spectical the Democrates will make of themselves. I can see Senator "Sewer Trout" Kennedy so mad he turns plaid, Box and Feinstein trying to out "outraged" each other, Pelosi admitted for emergency Botox treatments, "Chuckie Cheese" Schumer slithering on stage to demand something, he's not sure what, but he is demanding it and Boom Hilda screaching.
Keep the tapes rolling. That is our opposition research for 2006.
Glad you enjoyed the satire, buffy. Thanks for reading.
Thanks for reading, CM55. I appreciate it.
Glad you enjoyed it, LV. Thanks for reading.
Glad you enjoyed the satire. Thanks for reading and good point.
Thanks for reading, ken. Good point. I believe the same will happen here, but we're not there yet.
That's a good thing. I didn't want to break the can of you know what out on you. :) HA!
Thanks for reading, neodad. I appreciate it, sir.
If McCain has his way, they'd all be extreme. Good one, SDGOP and a belated welcome to FR.
Appropriate graphic, E. Thanks for posting it.
Thanks for reading, bubman. I appreciate it.
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