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Skoos Wif Good Skoo marms Is Best-Suited t'Shape Yo'ng Minds By Abner Ole Jeb Thar's nothin' like havin' th' right varmint wif th' right experience, skills an' tools t'accomplish a specific tax. Sartin jobs is bess lef' t'th' pros, sech as, fo'mal ejoocayshun. Thar is few homeownys who kin tackle ev'ry aspeck of home repair. A few of us might knows carpentry, plumbin' an', let’s say, cementin'. Others may knows about eleckrical wawk, tilin' an' roofin'. But hardly ennyone kin does it all, ah reckon. Same goes fo' cars. Not menny varmints haf th' skills an' smarts t'perfo'm all repairs on th' fambly car. Even eff'n they does, they probably don’t own th' right tools. Heck, some varmints haf their han's full jest knowin' how t'drive. So, whuffo''d some parents assoom they knows 'nuff about ev'ry academic subjeck t'home-skoo their chillun? Yo''d reckon thet they might leave this hyar -- th' shapin' of their chillun’s minds, careers, an' futures -- t'trained professhunals. Thet is, t'them who haf wawked steadily at their professhun fo' 10, 20, 30 years! Skoo marms! Experienced Pros Thar’s nothin' like havin' th' right varmint wif th' right experience, skills an' tools t'accomplish a specific tax. Whether it is window-warshin', bricklayin' o' designin' a space stashun. Sartin jobs is bess lef' t'th' pros. Fo'mal ejoocayshun is one of them jobs. Of course thar is circumstances thet might make it necessary fo' parents t'larn their chillun at home. Fo' example, eff'n th' chile is sevahely han'icapped an' kinnot be transpo'ted safely t'a skoo, o' is bedridden wif a serious disease, o' lives in sech a remote area thet attendin' a public skoo is near impostible. Wal-Meanin' Amateurs Th' number of parents who c'd easily send their chillun t'public skoo but opp fo' home-skooin' instead is on th' increase. Sevahal o'ganizashuns haf popped up on th' Web t'sarve these wannabe skoo marms. These o'ganizashuns is even runnin' ads on prime time tellyvishun. Af'er viewin' one advahtisement, ah searched a home skoo Web site. This hyar site corntains some statements thet REALLY irritate me! * “It’s not as difficult as it looks.” Th' “it” is meant t'be “larnin'.” Let’s face it, larnin' chillun is difficult even fo' experienced professhunals. Wannabes haf no idea. * “Whut in tarnation about socializashun? Fo'git about it! Fry mah hide!” Fo'git about interackin' wif others? Is they nuts? Socializashun is an impo'tant component of gittin' along in life. Yo' kinnot larn it. Chillun sh'd haf th' oppo'tunity t'interack wif others their own age. Wifout allerin' their chillun t'min'le, trade ideas an' thunks wif others, these parents is creatin' social misfits. Eff'n this hyar Web site incouraged home-skooed chillun t'join af'er-skoo clubs at th' local skoo, o' participate in spo'ts o' other community ackivities, then ah might feel diffrunt. Jawja state laws, fo' example, require local skoo districks t'aller home-skooed students t'participate in their athletic programs. Fo' this hyar Web site t'declare, “fo'git about it,” is bad advice. When ah wawked fo' Wal-Mart mo'e than 20 years ago, Zephaniah Walton once told me: “ah can larn Wal-Mart assosheeates how t'use a computer, calculato', an' how t'operate like retailers. But ah can’t larn them how t'be a teammate when they haf nevah been part of enny team, dawgone it.” * “Viset our online booksto'e.” Buyin' a histo'y, science o' math book does not mean an adult kin autymatically instruck others about th' book’s corntent. Gullible Parents T'other Web site axs fo' donashuns an' posts noospaper articles pertainin' t'problems occurrin' in public skoos. It’s obvious t'me thet these o'ganizashuns is in it fo' th' money. They is involved in th' ejoocayshun of chillun mostly in th' hope of profitin' at th' han's of fine-meanin' but gullible parents. This hyar includes parents who home-skoo their chillun fo' reasons thet may be linked t'religious cornvickshuns. One Web site thet ah visited stated thet th' bess way t'combat our nashun’s “ungodly” public skoos was t'remove students fum them an' larn them at home o' at a Jedtian skoo. I’m sartinly not opposed t'religious skoos, o' t'ennyone stan'in' up fo' whut they believe in, as enny fool kin plainly see. ah admire ennyone who has th' stren'th t'stan' up aginst th' majo'ity. But in this hyar case, pullin' chillun outta skoo is not th' bess way t'fight th' laws thet govahn our ejoocayshun system, dawgone it. No battle has evah been won by retreatin'! Fry mah hide! No Trainin' Don’t most parents haf a tough inough job larnin' their chillun social, disciplinary an' behavio'al skills? They'd be wise t'he'p their chillun an' themselves by leavin' th' responsibility of larnin' math, science, art, writin', histo'y, geography an' other subjecks t'them who is smart, trained an' motivated t'do th' bess job postible. (Abner Ole Jeb, a member of th' Illinois Ejoocayshun Associashun, is haid cestodian at Brownstown Elementary Skoo in Southern Illinois.) Th' views expressed in this hyar column is them of th' autho' an' does not necessarily refleck th' views of th' NEA o' its affiliates.