oh i see, you are new to parenting. well for starters, at that age you don't take them to the same sorts of places that you can when they are bigger and able to behave. My husband and i took turns taking our kids to church when they were that age, so that they would not disrupt the people around us. it is a mistake to believe that failure to behave is a manifestation of personality. don't buy into that. of course you can't discipline a one year old, but you can control where she goes and when bigger you can teach them where it is appropriate to be quiet. my kids are now 11, 14 and 17 and we have always gotten compliments on their behavior at restaurants and other places. and they sure as heck know bratty behavior when they see it exhibited by other kids. your child is a baby at 1 year old. don't confuse that with what we are talking about.
"She's not following our rules so I guess we should discipline her, eh"
Um...yes. Where's the question? Rules are meaningless if you don't enforce them. And even 1 year olds can be disciplined.
Why would you even think saying "shhh" to a one year old would have any effect at all???
susie
That is too funny. Yes, discipline the one year old. Be stern and teach her that being loud and throwing things will get an immediate negative reaction. If you don't do it now then she'll be an obnoxious brat in no time.
I have two kids, 4 and 5. I know whereof I speak.
I don't really suspect you really want an answer about disciplining a 1 yr old. But we had a very well behaved (for his age) 1 yr old who we were able to take to restaurants, on aircraft flights, etc.
First we recognized his age and behavior limits and chose our restaurants and the times we went and the time we spent there accordingly. No fine dining with 8PM reservations. But we did go sometimes at 5 or 6PM, when we knew we could be served and done within an hour or so.
We knew our child's bedtime and his fussy time and avoided public places at those times. For the sake of others.
We considered restaurant meals with the kid as social training time as well as recreation. Not a leisurely let-down-our hair time to drink and talk while the kid screamed, yelled, jabbered loudly, threw stuff or did anything to inconvenience or disturb the pleasure of other paying customers.
When we ordered we asked that the waiter bring the check with the meal, to save restless time at the end of the meal and to help if we had to make a quick departure.
We had a bag full of little quiet toys and books and used diversions that kept him quietly entertained in his high chair. From the table, bread crumbs and little coffee creamers were offered as treats (we cleaned up the mess on his tray). We had fun playing together at the table. He learned to like restaurants because he got positive attention fro interaction. He was not left to fend for himself and get bored and be disruptive to others while we dined.
When all failed and the baby whimpered or fussed or squirmed, it was time to take him out of the high chair, If the lap didn't settle him, we walked him. If he still fussed, we took turns taking him outside.
The older he got, the better he got about the restaurant routine and how to behave. He was also a champ on long distance travel. Easy to soothe, not anxious about crowds and noise.
Do you get a picture of parenting techniques that consist of something besides saying "shhh" and throwing up your hands if that doesn't work?
Nobody said that children should NEVER be loud...they said they should have public manners. That would cover probably 10% of their awake time, right?
If she's loud and throws things, then I would recommend you limit the amount of time you spend in restaurants with her until she has more control, or hang out at Mickey D's.
That wasn't so tough, huh?
Please, no one is extending this to 1 year olds and you know it. Babies aren't disciplined and no one expects them to be.
Do you understand the difference between discipline and punishment?
Uh, yes, I think you should discipline her. One-year-old is not too young to be taught the concept of boundaries of behavior. We introduced our two kids to the concept of "no" at about that stage.