Take a disc of steel (picture a manhole cover, only larger) Cut a hole in the center of the disc. Weld hinges to the perimeter of the disc enabling the attachment of pipes. The hinges will allow the pipes to be extended from the disc to form a cone, with the small end at the top. Attach nylon (or other fabric) cloth to the pipes, forming a tent-like structure. (Picture a tepee.) Insert the "tepee" into a sleeve enabling it to be deployed at the end of a long flexible pipe, like a folded umbrella in a sheath. Maneuver the "tepee over the leak, slide it out of the sleeve and spread the pipe framework into the cone shape resting the large end on the sea floor. Suction the oil and gas out the top of the cone via the suction hose.
The material between the pipe frame would contain the petroleum while allowing water to pass under and through it, allowing the oil to migrate to the top where it could be suctioned.
BP is taking suggestions @ 281-366-5511.