All of my children are much better off than I am, but I want to leave them an inheritance. I just don't quite how to go about it. I have a terminal lung illness, and I have to make decisions, and I will take all of the suggestions that I can get.
So sorry to hear of your illness.
It is wise to get input, especially from those with some experience in the matter. Hopefully it will help you make a choice about the inheritance that you are comfortable with.
Coldwater Creek, I say a quick prayer for you. Bless you for considering your inheritance even when faced with terminal lung disease.
There is a set amount of money you can give someone per year without them having to declare it on their taxes. I think it is $4000. Someone out there can correct me if I’m wrong.
If I were you, I’d try to disburse some of that even now. Tell them what you are doing and why.
Have you sat down and talked with all of them together? Who else would need to be included?
If you don’t have a lot of money or property, what is more important are keepsakes. Some things you don’t care about may have sentimental value to one or another of the kids. And these are the things that can cause hard feelings.
You should talk to each of them separately about whatever favorite items there may be. They probably won’t want to deal with it, they’ll say they don’t want anything, but just tell them you’re working on your will and you want to make sure the keepsakes are accounted for. Ask each one about his siblings, is there anything your sister would want? This gets them to thinking about it. If both of you want it, how do you suggest I resolve it?
In some cases its better to hand those out before you die. You get the joy of seeing their reaction and you know it went to who you chose.
Tell them what you’re thinking about doing with the house, and judge their reaction.
People are funny. When it comes to wills its almost like they are looking for a reason to be hurt. So talk to them, then sort it out on paper, then talk to them again. Once you’ve got the will sorted out, show it to them so nothing in it comes as a surprise. Make sure they all know where the papers are for the house, loan papers, insurance papers, or whatever.
Money is usually easy, especially if you don’t have a lot. You just split it. Its the things that can’t be divided that are harder. If you can talk those things out before you die its better.
Another thing. I know I’m probably intruding and I don’t know you to have that right. I know you’re a believer, but if you aren’t real outward with your faith its important to talk to the kids at least once about it before you go. They need that. They may or may not be outwardly religious but its important to them to hear you talk about your faith before you check out. It will mean an awful lot to them when you go. They need to know Dad’s alright with God and even if they already know, they need to hear it again. How you go out is a lot more important than money or stuff.
Give them monies and interest in properties now. Check but I think it is up to 10K this year, and 10 k more jan 1 Then divide up the rest.