You make me laugh. You have to be careful what you say around here - people will call you on it.
Call me what, exactly? Names? Start acting sanctimonious? Maybe issue a death threat or two? (Haven't seen one of those in a while).
And just to put the resume issue to bed, I sent mine to U.S. Steel once. I was called in for an interview (to my surprise), but the first words out the guy's mouth were "I don't have a job for you, I just wanted to meet you."
So we sat for an hour and chatted about things like electric arc furnaces, unfunded pension liabilities, and "too big to fail" (He laughed at the last one, while I noted the incongruity of his doing so in a teak-lined office).
Not really making a point, just sharing the story. And maybe reminding you, in my own way, that I made my name 42 to 48 thousand pounds of steel at a time, while it appears that your company (I might be incorrect, but no matter--you still act it) looks like it does a lot of its shipping via FedEx or UPS.