—Have to wonder about him though, he married her.—
I wouldn’t. I used to think divorced people were sort of second class citizens until it happened to me, completely out of the blue, after 20 years and 3 great kids. And I mean I didn’t see it coming. Not because everything was perfect, but because I respected her to be an adult and sincerely try to work things out. My take aways from the experience:
1. Love is a decision.
2. Everyone is loveable and hateable, depending on how you want to see them. If you fall out of love with your spouse, it is not because of them. It is because of you.
3. If you marry a person because of how they may please you as opposed to how you may please them, your getting off on the wrong foot.
4. If you stop loving your spouse, either because they didn’t change, or because they did, it is your responsibility, not theirs.
5. You cannot control your spouses feelings. Only your own.
When mine dumped me I was done with women until I really DID get a brand new girlfriend. And I could have practically written that song. I did sing it in my country band a couple years later (I wasn’t even IN bands nor did I play bass or sing in my “previous life”). And we DID get married and the honeymoon is over 13 years and counting. :-)
She was and still is mentally ill in some way. Her life is a wreck after another failed marriage and today none of her grown kids have much to do with her. She made life hell for all of us.
I have been married to my wife now for 22 years. She is a peach (and far better looking than I deserve). We fit like peas and carrots and I am a happy fellow.
Glad you are too. Many people aren't ever that fortunate.
And we DID get married and the honeymoon is over 13 years and counting. :-)
Wow, good story. Congratulations on your new life. You seem as though you have learned a lot and brought a lot of good stuff to your second marriage. Good job.