and Roe V Wade sealed the deal
And "no fault" divorce opened the door to both of these. What's the point of saving it until marriage when there's only a 50/50 chance that's going to last?
How about because “it’s the right thing to do”?
My family has been very fortunate. My parents have been married 61 years and raised 12 children - 10 of which married and only one has ever been divorced (but is now remarried to the man she divorced). One daughter had a child out of wedlock and grew incredibly from that experience and is now happily married. One is in a very difficult marriage because his wife is basically bi-polar but won’t take medicine for it, but they’ve held on by God’s grace.
I don’t think we ever really considered divorce an option, even though the divorce rates in the general population are about 50-50.
My husband’s parents have been married 56 years and all 4 of their children have been married. Two have divorced - one after being married less than a year to a bi-polar woman and the other after 11 years of marriage to a man who increasingly disrespected her as a result of pornography addiction.
I think a lot of things factor into divorce, but each marriage partner’s personal strength, sacrifice, commitment, and faithfulness in areas of personal morality make a huge difference.
I suspect that the divorce rate is much smaller among those whose only sexual partner is their spouse - partly because they don’t have the baggage caused by giving everything to another person and then walking away from them anyway, and partly because they started out with a more solid idea of what faithfulness is and a belief that faithfulness is important even if there aren’t guarantees of any tangible rewards.
I’ve noticed that a lot of people who cohabitate do so after they’ve been divorced. My neighbor was afraid to remarry because she just didn’t believe she had it in her to keep a promise for life. In a way, it’s giving up on love that can last a lifetime. It’s fear, and I feel really sad that so many people are stuck in that.
I believe that the FEELING of love comes and goes throughout a lifetime, and when it doesn’t feel like love that’s when stubborn commitment has to carry you through. That’s true for all relationships, not just marriage. Ultimately love is a gift of God. His love never ends, and He can fill us to overflowing so that when we by ourselves have nothing to give to our spouse or even feel dead to them, He can give us the love to fill our needs and to give to others. That’s the love that carries us through.
But a person who scorns that love or believes that God is a party-pooper who wants to spoil our fun and just isn’t hip or smart enough to understand modern times... is more likely to bail out when the going gets tough rather than wait for that love to carry them through the dry times of life.
I had a very, very difficult time in my marriage some years ago and felt like I couldn’t take it any more. I harbored thoughts that I am very ashamed of now, which is what pain does to a person. But there is healing for pain, and my marriage today is a testament to the fact that real change is possible - in individuals and in couples. But I think it very seldom happens without the love of God carrying people through, because our commitment and our feelings of love are so fickle.