New product line... Trump’s Toupees. ?
The hair emerges from his skull in lonely stalks scattered about his skull. It's then spray painted the color of a traffic cone. The stalks are grown to a uniform height of a half inch, before being bent and woven into a near transparent scaffolding helmet that floats above his liver-spotted cranium.
Lastly, it's all puffed up and charged for ionic bonding with a blondish rusty talcum powder that gives the thin hair web that fabioesque fullness that is the envy of all balding octogenarians playboys everywhere.