So can the state then force a contractual spouse to testify against their contractual partner in court? Also, from the point of view of taxes then will my stay at home spouse then be nonexistent, i.e., I will be treated as if I am a single person perhaps doubling my taxes? If you want to really kill traditional marriage then treat the traditional man works/wife stays home the same as a single person enjoying life in SF.
In your situation, yes, getting marital status out of the tax code would increase your household taxes. For an increasing number of us (two-earner households with both making substantial incomes), however, there is still a marriage penalty in the federal tax code, not a subsidy. So, the tax argument for keeping government in the marriage business doesn't really work for me.