I don’t recall that past where we called molesters “loving”, and of evil grandfathers.
You sound a little damaged also.
Damaged? No, not all. I look upon my childhood as a great time...Have and had wonderful parents and grandparents (non-abusive).
I have a couple physicians in my family and they would explain that older adults and seniors didn’t like to use the term “molested” and other more descriptive terms. They would say “loving” in describing these people. I even heard clergy say this as well.
And, my use of “grandfather” was a fill in the blank easily substituted with anyone.
Maybe that explains things better.