“The Tesla ran a 17.46 quarter with a top speed of 82 mph. I had a Pontiac LeMans years ago that would do that.”
I’ve got a 2015 BMW x1 35i that can run it much faster than 17 seconds; about 14 seconds at most. The Tesla is a slow pig for all its supposed 691 HP. Heck, the BMW runs 0-60 in 5.1 seconds.
The Tesla P85D has a 3.2 second 0-60.
The Tesla has a 0-60 time of 3.2 seconds, the fastest of any four-door production car in the world. I think you are in some serious denial if you want to call it a “slow pig.”
I think there is a 12-step program that might help with that.