Bending Rodriquez"? Gadzooks, Lucido! Keep that on the quiet-- I'm double dipping as both a Unregistered-Democrat Voter on the dole... 
and an historical beer taster for Lone Star Draft under the name James Samuel Davy Crockett Houston Bowie Bender-Symth.
And I barkeep on the weekend at the All Black All Nude Soul Food Tavern but I'll get fired... 
if they know this a just paint and that I slipped across the Rio Grande one dark midnight--
Whoa! That's was you, Bendy... 
handing me that Sex-on-the-beach with real sand in it?
Gadzooks, Al! Where you had your hands... 
make me figure sand in your drink is the least of your problems!