[Boogieman]

I am offering my services to any needy college students, to act as their “sex witness”. I will sit quietly in a dark corner of the room to make sure that consent is asked and agreed to for each individual act of a sexual nature, and, if necessary, I will provide my unbiased, eyewitness testimony to any college tribunals as needed.

Now, I know $100/hour sounds like a steep price for this service, but remember, your reputation, and future livelihood is at stake!

[Political Junkie Too]

Maybe you should charge by the credit-hour and then get a degree out of it.

-PJ

[unlearner]

Don’t be creepy.

[Resolute Conservative]

Lena Dunham and Rosie O’Donnell need your phone number.