Male-Female Relations Are Approaching the Status of Race Relations

RUSH: Okay. I just have one more thing here before we swerve back into the sexual harassment story. And I have to tell you, folks, there’s a part of this that is beginning to make me nervous, as an umbrella thing, not specifically. I’m just spotting a trend, and I know you have too. I’m sure I’m not the only person in this crowd. But you know, this business of sexual abuse is quickly approaching the same dynamics as racism in our culture.

And just as racism is a horrible thing to be accused of, and depending on how it’s done it’s sometimes hard to disprove it, it’s the same thing here with being accused of all kinds of improper behavior against women, especially blind allegations, they can be really tough to defend, especially the way the table is being set today. That women never make it up, that women don’t lie about it, that women must be believed. This is not an anti-woman screed. Now, don’t anybody misunderstand me here.

I’m addressing this as though we’re all human beings. Forget sex, gender, and all of that. I’m just assessing where our culture is going. And it’s because of the politicization of everything, because we have politicized relationships now. We have politicized the way men and women interact. That all began with feminism in the modern era of the late sixties. We politicize everything. The NFL is politicized, you name it, it’s all politicized now. And so since it’s politicized, those who use politics as a weapon then seize on everything that occurs and they use it as a weapon.

And so now male-female, man-woman, boy-girl relationships end up being weaponized by the people who have an agenda attached to them. And so if you’re going to come along, if we as a society are going to agree because of the hot-button tensions of the moment that the women must be believed, and I’m just pointing it out here. This is not yet a direct criticism of this. I’m just chronicling that this is happening where we are.

If that is going to be our standard as a society as we strive to fix this problem, if part of our decision, part of our technique to fix it is to say women never make it up, women must be believed, then it’s gonna be very, very difficult to ever defend against a surprise allegation that comes out of the blue. And what’s gonna happen is is that people are going to become more distant from one another. People are going to be suspicious and cognizant and sensitive to even the most innocently stated thing or innocently-engaged-in behavior could be grossly misunderstood and a life or future destroyed because of it.

And so people, to guard against that, are gonna clam up and they’re gonna avoid, because look what happens here. Take the case of Roy Moore and you’ve got the original allegation. Now how many of them are there? Five or six? And what’s happening? Every woman is believed because of the politicization of this. Every woman is believed, not doubted at all. It’d be the same thing with Franken except in his case we’ve got a photo, and in his case we have a body of evidence that backs up the allegation.

But there’s gonna be a time where somebody totally innocent is accused of this and isn’t gonna have a photo that would disprove it. So I’m just alerting you. I mean, you know how paralyzing the allegation of racism is. And you know how the whole subject of race, even though we have gone to war, even though 500,000-plus Americans have died to end slavery, we may as well have not taken one step toward ending slavery as the entire subject of race is used as a political weapon in America today.

And because of the immediate benefits, the perceived immediate benefits here politically of identifying somebody as a reprobate or a thug or a pig, you name it, the politically oriented are glomming onto this, and it has the potential of spiraling way out of control because, as you know, not every one of us is clean and pure as the wind-driven snow.

Not every one of us is honest. Not every one of us is satisfied with how much money we have. Not every one of us believes that the way to get more money is to work hard for it. Not every one of us believes innocent ’til proven guilty. Not every one of us is willing to offer the benefit of the doubt to people that make us mad or offend us.

We wish that was the culture we lived in. We wish that was the society we. But we don’t anymore. We live in a “get even with ’em as fast as you can-ism” kind of country now. We live in a “take ’em out before they know what hit ’em” culture now. And of course the reason we hit ’em before they know what’s hit ’em and the reason we want to take ’em out, that’s political too. It doesn’t matter if they’re nice people or not. It doesn’t matter if other people love and respect them, doesn’t matter.

If somebody can get rich quick, if somebody can get rid of a political enemy, if somebody can get rid of a president, then who cares if some small fry people fall by the wayside in the process. Now, it’s even risky to say what I just said, because it could easily be demagogued. You could easily see a story later: “Limbaugh thinks sexual harassment is never happening and is criticizing women who lie when they come forward.” And I didn’t say anything even approaching that, but this is how it now works.

If you don’t get with the groupthink, if you don’t adopt immediately the cultural and conventional wisdom, if you don’t loudly and publicly let everybody know that you think like everybody else does and you agree with what everybody else is agreeing with, then you are identifying yourself and you’re painting bull’s-eye on your back. And I of course experience this daily because I purposefully do not follow conventional wisdom precisely because it is groupthink.

And if I ever find myself thinking like the group does, I immediately grab hold of myself and say, “What am I doing wrong?” Or, “What am I not thinking through?” Or, “What’s happening?” ‘Cause never, ever do I go with the flow. Well, I can’t say never, ever. I mean, there have to be times where I agree with the majority, but I’m just saying as a general principle, when you’re talking about the political conventional wisdom of the day, I am not a practitioner. Just the opposite. I go the other way, in some cases on purpose.

But just my announced and professed concern with the quasi-warning about where we might be headed, could be and probably will be twisted into saying something I never said. And then the allegations will be out there, and I’ll have to come to you the next time and start defending myself for something I didn’t say. Whereas other people are going to be in the precarious circumstance of defending themselves against something they didn’t do. This is precisely how groupthink and politically correct tyranny triumph by literally frightening people into not saying anything that doesn’t already comport with the conventional wisdom.

RUSH: Okay. Now, you can pooh-pooh what I said. Feel free. But let me just ask you a couple behavioral questions. As you know, the way we have been created as human beings, there are various roles that men and women have been assigned that we call human nature. And, of course, with everything there are exceptions. So nothing is uniform. But it has genuinely been accepted human behavior over the course of millennia that men chase women. Correct? Nothing wrong with that. Men face a lot of rejection. Women have to get good at doing it.

Woody Allen said, “The only difference I’ve noticed about success is being rejected by a higher class of woman. That’s all success has meant to me.” Yes, there are women who pursue men. I know this. But the general rule of thumb has been that it’s men who propose, men who ask women out on dates. The question is this: If the politicization of male-female relationships continues on its present path, and if men become afraid of even that behavior, if simply asking for a date is considered stalking or is considered harassment — and don’t think it can’t get there.

We’re on that path now. Then what happens? What do men do? Rather than run the risk of being accused of being a stalker or harasser? Because, look, sometimes you have to ask a woman out four times before she’ll say “yes.” In the old days — right, Snerdley? — sometimes it took more effort than that. What if the second time is considered stalking? What if the third time is considered harassment? So what are men gonna do if they decide, “Okay, screw it! I don’t even want to run the risk, and so they stop the pursuit?” The healthy pursuit, I mean.

What happens? Do women pick up the slack? Does it become acceptable for women to then become the, shall we say, aggressors, the person of action in a couple scenario like this? I don’t know. I have no answers to this. I could guess. But men are amazingly adaptive. Men want to be around women and will do whatever it takes to succeed. They will fake being pro-choice, for example, like in Hollywood. They’ll totally lie about it. They will say, “Oh, yeah, man! I would love to go to the museum and look at elephant tusks.” They’ll do anything, if they really want to be with a woman.

So what’s the adaptation gonna be if even the slightest approach or bit of attention runs the risk of a stalking charge or an harassment charge? Back off! Don’t do it. Find some other way. (Hello, Playboy magazine? I don’t know.” And maybe nothing. I mean, I could be, you know, exaggerating this to the point none of this is gonna happen. But I nevertheless ponder it, because take the circumstances we’re all facing now with race. I mean, look how race is permeating everything. We have ended slavery, 500,000 Americans died, and it may as well not have ever happened.

The NFL is destroying itself over the premise, essentially, that that didn’t happen, that we haven’t solved anything, and that there is still wanton lynching and murder of innocent African-American men. You know it as well as I do. And there are lies aplenty. “Hands up, don’t shoot.” It didn’t happen, and yet how many of these NFL players protesting still to this day probably think that it did? So how does that affect other people who don’t want to go anywhere near being accused of racism. They just stay away, right? It leads to segregation, in that case, in that instance. Will that happen with men and women? I doubt it.

RUSH: I tell you what’s gonna happen. If asking a woman out on a date becomes sexual harassment or stalking, I tell you what’s gonna replace that: Sex robots. There are already stories of sex robots that are out there and being tested and supposedly enjoyed. Don’t laugh, folks. People are very creative and resourceful when it comes to sex.

I've listened to Rush, on and off since 1989. When he was doing the prescription drug he was NUTS and after a while a full 3 hours a day, for from many days on end, he talked/rambled on about TOE FUNGUS, so I stopped listening to him for a while back then. Then I went off him again during '15-'17...so just I listened on and off because he was just awful.

Sex robots? Oh good grief...I'm glad I didn't have the radio on yesterday!

IIRC...he met his second wife on line ( she was an early "groupy" of his, so all his time on line was NOT "show prep", much of which he stole from poster replies here and used them as his own words ) and the deaf bit was an excuse; he was over dosing on his pain pills.

Not only were his "new digs" ( his first apartment in NYC was no big deal, since he couldn't have cared less about being in NYC !) horribly decorated, but after it was done ( which was garrish, but he had wanted to "impress" the new, "IN" people he was mingling with and neither he nor that wife had any taste ) he fought with the decorator over the bill.

The "cheating" thing is something that poster pulled out of thin air; there hasn't be a word of that anywhere, that I know of.

At one time, he was a workaholic; he hasn't been one for many, many, many years and it shows!

You do NOT know HOW to be in a relationship, so it's a good thing that you enjoy being with yourself.

Why live in one of THE most vibrant cities in the world and hardly venture outside your own domicile? And as I said in my earlier post, there always have been great things to do in NYC, from street fairs to historical site, to just people watching as one walks, that don't cost even a penny. And since he could afford theatre tickets, opera tickets, ballet tickets, baseball tickets, museum fees ( great museums which once were free and some of which still were, back then ! )to not avail one's self of ANY of that, and he didn't, is stupid beyond words!

His show prep really didn't take up all waking hours, when he wasn't on! And back then, he had people writing and doing parody songs for his show ( which he had NO part in at all! )which took up lots of time.

How long have YOU been listening to his radio show?

Did you ever watch his T.V. show?

I started listening to him in 1989 and watched his T.V. show when it was on. And trust me, he was just a lumpen hick, who was out of his depth and anti-social back then. Once the glitterati took him up, then he spent money like water, but the first wife was gone by then and the second wife, whom he met on line ( SHOW PREP MY AUNT FANNY! ) were out and about.

How do you know that you don't want to do something, without even giving it a try ?

Why pass up seeing historical sites, taking a ferry ride or a boat ride around Manhattan, with someone teaching you about the places you're passing? Neither of those things costs much and are fun things to do; especially with someone you supposedly love!

The 42 Street library is an architectural wonder, inside and out, and the number of books is astounding! AND IT'S ALL FREE!

Back when he first lived in NYC there were still some great shows on Broadway and the tickets were far less expensive than the outrageous prices they are asking now. And he could well afford to go to any number of them, but didn't.

Just being with someone you love, sharing experiences, strengthens that relationship. Sometimes that can cost money; many times it costs nothing!

OTOH...being in a place that offers SO much and such varied things to do and see, but NOT taking advantage of any of it is STUPID!

Not exactly.

I'm saying that acting as though one isn't married ( being ignored and nobody knows what else was wrong with that marriage, but we do know about that ), whilst being married, can be a pretty big cause for divorce.

And if you didn't know...he was also "talking" with the woman who became his second wife, on line, while ignoring his first wife.

Back then, Rush even talked about, proudly and disdainfully, how he hated NYC and couldn't be bothered with taking advantage of where he was. And then, all of a sudden, once he was taken up by the glitterati, he was out and about like crazy; but that was after wife #1 was gone!

From your post and another, it sounds as though there are posters here who haven't even a scintilla of an idea what it takes to have a good marriage or any kind of a relationship.

I’ve lived in Brooklyn for 28 years out of my 32; I’m aware of about 20-21 years.

There’s nothing good about living here. Never has been, never will be. If you live somewhere in the midwest or south, maybe I could trade places with you.

I really don’t care about going out and about to see the city. I just want to get where I have to go within a reasonable time, and I hate having to dodge tourists that take pictures of everything - especially when they stop short and you practically walk into them. And the buses and trains here... great example of how not to run a public transportation system.

There aren’t any open spaces here, and there aren’t any proper firearm ranges; I have experience with a Ruger 10/22, and a little .22 pistol, that’s it. Never fired 5.56, 7.62, .50, nothing else. The cost of living here is outrageous - we have roomshares that cost over $1000; you’re lucky to get a studio for less than $900. Taxes are ridiculous, the cost of living is ridiculous, everything is ridiculous. The city has gotten worse under Bill Bird, but guess what? The city chose to keep him for another 4 years. You think that’s a good city? He’s been disastrous.

I’ll go out to a movie theater maybe once every 2-3 years. I don’t go to watch Hollyweird productions - last two movies I saw were Japanese animation. Great characters, great stories, great voice acting, the whole works.

When I do go out somewhere, it’s with family and friends of the family. I also go places with my own friends, but that’s rare. Usually someone or other is playing a show at a bar or small venue.

There’s nothing here for anybody. People from other states and countries that come to live here are crazy. They’re totally jaded, and cannot understand or even accept the point of view of someone native to the city.

If I had the resources to leave, I already would have. Where I’d go... any place but here.

And again... why spend money if you don’t want to? He was under no obligation to spend money. He hated decorating? So do I. I hate deciding that, and I hate shopping. Maybe he hates shopping too. That would be something me and Rush have in common.

Look kid, I'm a born, bred, and wed NEW YORKER, from an "old New York family", and I know what NYC used to be like and what it's like now; though no, I don't live there any more. Ergo, your personal history lesson, which has absolutely NO bearing on what things were like in 1989 Manhattan, is irrelevant and just YOU moaning and groaning about your poor widdle horrible life.

Have you even ever been to the Brooklyn Museum ?

I went there when I was 6 and it was AMAZING ( not as good as the Met, mind you, but good ), way back when.

And there are great places to go and things to see in ALL of the 5 boroughs!

Open space? Go to central Park, Battery Park, lots of "green" spaces !

Yes, the damned tourists are damned awful; can't argue about that observation one bit. OTOH...those who move to NYC, from all over, who them call themselves "NEW YORKERS" are even worse!

People stopped voting. That stinking Commie de B. got elected, BOTH TIMES, by less than 20% of the eligible voting population!

The subways were horrible back in 1970 and have only gotten more expensive and worse since then. The buses, though slower, were still okay back then and I have no idea what they are like now, but I'll take your word for how they have degenerated.

NYC was ALWAYS an expensive place to live; though long before your parents were born, it was the ONLY major city that had poor, middle class, and wealthy distributions that were somewhat even.

Housing, in NYC, is partly a mess because of WWII rent stabilization and rent control laws and much newer laws re apartments for the "poor" stuff.

Is is somewhat cheaper to live in other places? Yes and no; you will NOT get paid anywhere near what you make now, for the same job, in other cities or towns! So costs may be less, but you have less money!

Do you love NYC pizza? If so, outside of a very few Northeast states...forget about finding even edible pizza, decent Italian restaurants, deli mustard, edible coleslaw, and a whole LOT of other things that you're used to and like.

Today's movies STINK, no matter where you live and unless you watch old ( very, very old to you ) movies, you have less than NO idea what a good movie is/should be like!

It wasn't that Rush didn't care about "decorating" at all...it's that he had NO taste and didn't understand what things he chose really cost! And he also didn't understand how a decorator works nor HOW to use one! He and his then wife loved the hot mess that they then lived with; neither knew any better. And obviously, you didn't pay all that much attention to what I and another poster wrote. LOL

You really think/imagine that things are better somewhere else, do ya? LOL,LOL,LOL

First of all, you've lived in Brooklyn ALL of your life! Anywhere else is going to be a foreign country for you AND you have an accent that will mark you. Many areas in this nation are populated by people who will HATE you, just because you sound "funny" to them and they blindly HATE New Yorkers. Just read posts here, by some of those morons! It won't matter at all, to those people that you are a CONSERVATIVE and like guns.

I'm not trying to insult you, nor telling you to never move; just trying to educate you and wake you up a bit to how things are outside of the bubble you live in.

Just read your post about NYC and you can’t find anything to do. I find that truly sad - and jaded. The young come to NYC to work or to find people like themselves or to pursue the arts. The tourists take pictures because they see things that you don’t seem to see. And they’re only here in the summer & at Xmas time.

It’s a wonderful vibrant city with PLENTY of open spaces - gorgeous 19th century designed parks and squares. Wonderful museums and while you may not like Hollywood movies, you could go to MOMA or Film Forum or what we did last night: went to The Museum of the Moving Image in Astoria to see Fellini’s classic “Nights of Cabiria.” You could go to the 42nd Street Library and read in the classically beautiful Reading Room. Wander the Village and go into all the little food stores in Little Italy or walk into Chinatown and buy cheap but pretty items for a girl friend. Eat Dim Sum! Go to the Strand Bookstore. Visit Eataly.

Look at the schedule of the Barnes & Noble at Union Square and go see a favorite author. I once saw Christoper Hitchens speak about “Bill and Hill” and take questions for two hours years ago. Buy tickets to a show, a rock concert, a classical concert, an opera or ballet. Watch the crowds pouring into Lincoln Center on a winter’s Saturday night! It’s like living in the movie “Moonstruck.”

You live in Brooklyn - now a vibrant, hipster place with endless amounts of great restaurants, craft beer producers and ethnic markets and eateries. When I was first married we lived in Carroll Gardens and loved it.

It’s not perfect. There’s crime and transit problems and you can’t find a place to shoot a gun. But you find problems wherever one lives. You might want to check yourself for depression - I’m serious.

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