Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

To: AUgrad
Antecedent to the situation we are in now, our Euro-Western society looked upon fatherhood as "optional". That is... at the father's option. The entire term "bastard" comes from this premis. If the father refused to acknowledge a child, the child effectively was "fatherless".

It is this mindset that lead to the present day relegation of fatherhood as less important. It came about by a significant enough percentage of fathers abdicating their obligations to their offspring. In addition to that, our own government (as the author touched on) has contributed to this mindset. One thing not mentioned is our government's viewpoint on the tens of thousands of children fathered by our milatary personell overseas. These children are considered "fatherless" unless the serviceman chooses, at his own option, to formally accept the child as his. This contributes to the overall consensus of the responsibilities of fatherhood as "optional" at the sole discretion of the father, and preceeds abortion by decades, if not thousands of years.

All this is not new news. Here is an article outlining the consequences of making fathehood "optional" through thte legal traditions of "bastardy" in England ... antecedent to our own common legal traditions in the US.

http://www.loyno.edu/~history/journal/1989-0/haller.htm

I agree that fathers are important. However, it disagree with the fraudulent use of "statistics" to conclude that single fathers are better than single mothers. There simply aren't enough single fathers to make a comparison by numbers. The study said ___ % of all kids with (various) negative outcomes grew up in a single mother home without mentioning the statistically few kids who grow up in single father homes. To make a direct comparison you'd have to find the percentage of kids with negative outcomes from each grouping, kids who grew up in single father homes and kids who grew up in single mother homes.

Single parenthood is a big problem. Many things IMO contribute to the mindset that it is ok. One example, the whole concept of "anonymous" parenthood in adoption, hiding the identity of the parents. Also, the practice of the father's name being "optional" on birth certificates is wrong, wrong, wrong and I believe an unConstitutional breach of the right to privacy of women (relative to men). If one parent's name is recorded anywhere, both should be. This practice started long ago when to protect the privacy of both parents, the woman was sent away to have a baby in secret. Still, her name was traceable though adoption records but the father's was not. Who instituted this practice? Adoptee Rights groups have long railed against this practice, and IMO rightly so. Every person has a right to know who his/her parents were.

Another example of anonymous parenting: Sperm (and egg) donation, where typically it is the father's identitity which is forever concealed. Even in sperm egg donation, the egg donar's identity is more documented and traceable than the sperm donar's. This again contributes to the same mindset that the father's contribution, even biologically, is of lesser importance.

Solutions: ___1. Talk about how babies are made honestly. Never, ever mention a baby, pregnacy, childbirth, children without including some reference to BOTH people who co-created a new person.___2. Don't ever say a child is "fatherless" unless you know for a fact the father is dead. No child is "fatherless". ___3. Say NO to all forms of anonymous procreation. All people should have full access to the full indentity of BOTH of their parents. ___4. Acknowledge that the parent who is a.w.o.l. is abdicating his/her obligation to the child. Don't place all "blame" on the parent who is present and accounted for.___5. Insist in all your conversations that fathers are equally important as mothers. Never make one out to be more important than the other.___6. Never imply that fatherhood is "optional" regardless of the circumstances of a child's conception. Insist that all people who co-create children have an OBLIGATION to that child. No exceptions, no excuses, no whining.
34 posted on 04/02/2002 9:21:53 AM PST by Lorianne
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]


To: Lorianne
1. Talk about how babies are made honestly. Never, ever mention a baby, pregnacy, childbirth, children without including some reference to BOTH people who co-created a new person.___2. Don't ever say a child is "fatherless" unless you know for a fact the father is dead. No child is "fatherless". ___3. Say NO to all forms of anonymous procreation. All people should have full access to the full indentity of BOTH of their parents. ___4. Acknowledge that the parent who is a.w.o.l. is abdicating his/her obligation to the child. Don't place all "blame" on the parent who is present and accounted for.___5. Insist in all your conversations that fathers are equally important as mothers. Never make one out to be more important than the other.___6. Never imply that fatherhood is "optional" regardless of the circumstances of a child's conception. Insist that all people who co-create children have an OBLIGATION to that child. No exceptions, no excuses, no whining.

I agree with all of that. But with the OBLIGATION comes the RIGHT to parent. Caps off.

71 posted on 04/03/2002 4:52:39 PM PST by The Giant Apricots
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 34 | View Replies ]

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson