Skip to comments.A FOUL FOWL... OR, WHY THE FRENCH STINK
Posted on 03/29/2002 11:08:35 AM PST by Sir Gawain
A FOUL FOWL
By: Nathan Porter
Is there any doubt why Chuck Jones made Pepe le Pew (the animated skunk who stunk) French? To paraphrase Gertrude Stein, in France, one must adapt oneself to the fragrance of a urinal, which isnt surprising given the fact that in much of Europe one must pay for the privilege of using a urinal, and since the French are so cheap, they must be pissing on themselves. Mark Twain once wrote, "The French were the connecting link between man and monkey." He forgot to mention the fact that the monkey didnt smell as bad as the Frenchman. My first experience with the French was as a 15-year-old traveling overseas. While rinsing off at the public shower at a Mediterranean beach, a French woman took the spigot next to me. The first thing I noticed was that she was topless. Then I took note of her massive breasts. "WOW," I thought. "Europe is the place for me." As I stood there ogling her breasts, I began to dream about what life in such a society must be like. Then something awful happened. She raised her arms and ran her hands through her hair. EGAD! The woman was hiding the Black Forest under there. And whats worse, she stank! It is a smell I will always associate with the French. I know what youre thinking. Youre saying to yourself, "Hey, Nate. Ever been to a Lilith Fair concert?" I understand your point. In the states, there are pockets of society where women embrace body-hair/body-odor chic. But the only women in America who do not shave their armpits are those who want to be men and those who want to act French. The French stink. Why should we take seriously the opinions of people who have such little regard for personal hygiene?
But as foul as the French smell, it pales in comparison to their stinking attitude toward America and American interests. Jerome Godefroy of RTL French Radio summed up the French view of America when he said, " There is this feeling not only with the French government, but the French public, the people of France, that many things are imposed by the United States. Not only this shield [SDI] but also, you know, your genetically [altered] food, the pollution. You only represent 5 percent of the population of this planet and suddenly you want to impose to the rest of world many things."
But it seems to me that it is the French who are always imposing on us. Imposing their socialist, humanist worldview by refusing to assist in our war against terrorism unless we play by their rules. Case in point, Zacarias Moussaoui. The Justice Department has finally announced that it will seek the death penalty for Moussaoui, the French citizen who has been charged with taking part in the September 11th conspiracy, even though he was in a Minnesota jail that day for immigration violations. France has reiterated its intent to oppose the death penalty if he is convicted, and announced that it will offer him diplomatic support while he's on trial. "We do not accept the death penalty," French Justice Minister Marylise Lebranchu said. Thats cool I dont either. I oppose the death penalty because I am pro-lifeI trust God to determine when life should end, not the Justice Department, a suicide doctor, or a capricious mother-to-be. I can respect and understand the French voicing their opposition to it, despite the fact that many legal experts believe it makes sense to seek the death penalty if only to build in a potential compromise. But of course the French dont stop there. Moussaoui is receiving French consular protection, which includes diplomatic visits to the inmate, support for his family in France, and assuring a "fair trial according to French standards." Dont you just love the French? One of their citizens gets caught in our country conspiring to kill thousands of Americans and they want us to try him according to French standards, whatever those may be.
The French interference in this case goes even deeper. France has also indicated that because the US is seeking the death penalty they might fail to cooperate in sharing evidence, of which they have plenty. Moussaoui, you see, was also under investigation by France. The difference being, if they were to convict him he could try suing for wrongful life, and if we convict him he might face a rightful death. Defenders of the French position point to our treaties with France that talk about not cooperating in an investigation where the death penalty is sought. But heres the point, while the US cannot force France to ignore the terms of a treaty, they dont have to obstruct the prosecution by insisting on them. Its their call. They can help out an ally when it needs them most or hold onto some smug, false air of superiority over the death penalty. Its not like were asking them to support the death penalty, were asking them to support our prosecution, which may or may not result in a death penalty. Moussaoui may walk free without their assistance, is it asking too much of the French to bend a little just this once? After all, they owe us.
The French started the Panama Canal, and the US finished it. The French rolled over in WWI, the US came in (a bit late) to free them. The French rolled over in WWII, and the US freed them. The French started the Viet Nam War, and the US lost 50,000 men trying to finish it. And what have the French done in return? They adopted Jerry Lewis as their favorite American. Hardly a fair trade.
To hear the French tell it, they will obstruct our prosecution of Mousaoui in order to preserve the high moral standards of the French judicial system, which values life. This is the same French judicial system that last fall issued a verdict in which it declared a right not to be born, leading one reasonable Frenchman to declare, "Certain judges still believe that it is better to be dead than to be handicapped." That is unless one is a convicted terrorist facing the American death penalty. In that case it is much better to be alive. This is the same country whose National Ethics Committee has embraced human euthanasia and a right to die. In short, this is France; a country that believes in a right not be born, a right to die after being born, a right to live after killing thousands, but no right to life for those most vulnerable among us. I stand in awe of French enlightenment.
The national bird of France is a Rooster. How appropriate that the national symbol of French pride is a cock.
They fought magnificently, and suffered losses much greater than we have in any war other than the WBTS.
WWII, different story. But don't denigrate their courage in WWI.
Yes, and they have their bones on display at Verdun to prove it. Incredible carnage and many acts of courage. Too bad their current generations fail to see the connection to today's fight with their own ancestors' struggles.
"We do not accept the death penalty," French Justice Minister Marylise Lebranchu said.
What are they going to do about it, fart in our general direction?
Who gives a rat's arse what the cheese eating surrender monkeys think? They've pre-surrendered through World War 6 (credit to an unknown Freeper for that one). Hell, they sheltered Khomeini for how many years, then just let the sumbitch go and topple the Shah. Now we face a possible war with a hostile and potentially nuke-armed foe of western civilization. Those whores of the world sold Saddam a nuke reactor for crying out loud! They won't offer help to us in prosecuting this scumbag - fine by me, we don't need Frog help to do anything (in fact, we're usually better off without their help, Yorktowne being the only exception that comes to mind). However, the surrender monkeys should not expect any of my hard currency to help out their socialist economy for a long time, at least until they invade Germany successfully.
My folks visited France about 20 years ago. I'll never forget my father's comment: "Well, we liked France a lot, except for all the Frenchmen."
And what have the French done in return? They adopted Jerry Lewis as their favorite American. Hardly a fair trade.
Well, maybe. I'll have to think on that one. If they take both Clintons, I'll take back everything I said (well, not really, but its worth a shot, no?).
France has also indicated that because the US is seeking the death penalty they might fail to cooperate in sharing evidence, of which they have plenty.
Washington, the next time France is occupied
The United States has also indicated that because France failed to cooperate in the criminal prosecution of Zacarias Moussaoui, it has decided not to cooperate in sharing troops to liberate their nation, of which they have plenty.
Perhaps it is natural selection - The bravest were all killed, leaving the wussies to propagate their clearly defective genes.
My dear sir, may I suggest that you consult an otolaryngologist? Clearly you are nose-deaf, olfaction-impaired, or smelling-challenged (take your pick of terminology). In any case, yours is clearly a minority view.