Posted on 04/22/2002 2:28:24 PM PDT by Saundra Duffy
Kevin and God:
My brother Kevin thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night. He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, and I stopped outside his closed door to listen. Are you there, God?" he said. "Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed."
I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement. But that night something else lingered long after the humor. I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in. He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult. He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will [in this life, anyway].
He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas, and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them. I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life? Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and later to bed. The only variation in the entire scheme are laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child. He does not seem dissatisfied. He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work. He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores. And Saturdays -- oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. "That one's goin' to Chi-car-go!" Kevin shouts as he claps his hands. His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.
And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips. He doesn't know what it means to be discontent. His life is simple. He will never know the entanglements of wealth of power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats.
His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be. His hands are diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it. He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished.
But when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax. He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure. He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue. Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere.
And he trusts God. Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God -- to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an "educated" person to grasp.
God seems like his closest companion. In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith. It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions.
It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap -- I am. My obligations, my fears, my pride, my circumstances -- they all become disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.
Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn? After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God. And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed. Kevin won't be surprised at all!
I have a wonderful son who is now 8 years old and is the joy of my life. When he was seven the world was full of wondrous exciting things. A balloon, a paper airplane, a piece of string, a tin can, a mud puddle, cuddles, hugs, bedtime stories, and all the rest of the simple pleasures that life holds. He taught me to find fun in the simplest of tasks, look for the magic in imagination, and to enjoy every minute. Seven is a great time.
One of the biggest lessons that my son has taught me, and I will never forget, was one of the best things that I will ever learn. We have a shop/barn located about 300 feet from our house. One day, a few years ago, he and I had to go to the shop to get some small tool for a repair project in the house. He was 4 years old and had to go with me as it was just the two of us that day. On the return trip there was a heavy shower of rain. Puddles of water, drippy trees, brisk wind, leaves falling, and I wanted to hurry and get out of the elements. He was holding my hand, splashing in the puddles, and dawdling along. As I was getting soaked he asked "Dad?". In my exasperation I replied "WHAT?" (more forcefully that I should have). He said "Isn't it a beautiful rainy day?"
I stopped in my tracks, looked at him, hugged him, gave him a kiss and then we spent the next 15 minutes spashing in every puddle that we could find. It was great fun.
I have thought of his lesson hundreds of times. It is all a matter of how you look at life, it is your choice how a situation appears. It has helped me to brighten my outlook and try to joyfully accept whatever comes my way. This process is an ongoing personal improvement project, and stories like the one that you posted about Kevin, help to remind me that "beautiful rainy days" are everywhere, you just have to see them.
Thanks for this story - it is inspiring!
Actually, my daughter had a monster under her bed a couple of years back.
"How can that be," I asked. "You sleep on a futon and it's right on the floor. There's no room for monster."
"He's very flat."
Thanks a lot for reminding me...that I'm too dumb to see what he saw, and to "smart" to find it.
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